July 1988. Rising star Paul Gascoigne transfers from Newcastle to Tottenham Hotspur for a record £2.2 million. And these forty singles were being transferred from shops to consumers for much less.
40 - “Car Wash/Is it Love You’re After,” Rose Royce
A single containing two previous Top Twenty hits made the Top Teenty itself. The A is the classic automobile-cleansing movie theme; the latter a funk workout that had just been heavily sampled for S’Express’ #1 “Theme from S’Express.” This would certainly have been excellent value for money.
39 - “Chains of Love,” Erasure
The sixth hit for the duo of ex-Depeche Mode and Yazoo man Vince Clarke and singer Andy Bell was this jaunty synth-dance-pop number about finding refuge in romance. It was their first single to cross the Atlantic, and I still rate it as one of their best.
38 - “You Came,” Kim Wilde
Kimmie’s fourth solo Top Five was this breezy dance pop about a life-altering relationship. Her performance makes it better than it should be.
37 - “Got to be Certain,” Kylie Minogue
Kylie’s second hit was this Stock/Aitken/Waterman confection about looking for a sure thing. And a sure thing was what she was establishing herself as, as her first seven U.K. hits would all hit either #1 or #2.
36 - “Fiesta,” The Pogues
The Celtic punks’ fourth hit was this Latin-tinged raveup inspired by a festival in Almería, Spain. There are references to macaroni, bingo, some kind of voodooesque doll, and the marriage of former bassist Cait O’Riordan to Elvis Costello. It’s a whole drunken night out in four minutes. Whether you’re a rambling boy of pleasure, a lady of easy leisure, or neither, you’re bound to love this one,
35 - “With a Little Help From My Friends/She’s Leaving Home,” Wet Wet Wet/Billy Bragg with Cara Tivey
A charity single for a youth help phone service called Childline, featuring two covers from the Beatles’ Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band. First, the Scots’ sophistipoppers take on the Ringo-led ode to loyalty and intoxication. Then, folkie Bragg and pianist Tivey perform Paul’s tale of a teenage runaway, told from the points of view of the girl and her parents. Both versions are musically faithful, but Bragg seems more invested. But the most important thing is that it went to #1 and raised a lot of money.
34 - “In My Dreams,” Will Downing
The second of three hits for this New York soul singer was this midtempo romantic smoothie. From this, I rate him as a better version of James Ingram.
33 - “You Have Placed a Chill itn My Heart,” Eurythmics
Another one from Dave and Annie, this one being a strident, beat-heavy number about trying to leave a bad relationship. They have quite a few songs that I feel should have bigger than they were, and this is one, even it did go Top Twenty.
32 - “Everlasting,” Natalie Cole
Nat King’s princess had just her third hit here with this pop-soul bit about finding permanent love. Generic. She didn’t have her father’s gift of elevating mediocrity. But very few do.
31 - “Don’t Believe the Hype,” Public Enemy
The third hit for the Long Island hip-hop groundbreakers was this pounding jam about being mischaracterized by mainstream media. Basically, it’s a funkier, more realistic, and just plain better version of Donald Trump’s Twitter feed.
30 - “All Fired Up,” Pat Benatar
The last of a mere three U.K. Top 40s for the rock Queen was this inspirational pump-up rocker. I just love this, and I can’t account for why. It just makes me want to do shit.
29 - “Heat it Up,” Wee Pappa Girl Rappers
The first of two hits by former Feargal Sharkey backup singers Sandra and Samantha Lawrence was this rap-house track. The rhymes are okay, the sisters have decent flow, and it all adds up to okay, nothing more.
28 - “Tomorrow People,” Ziggy Marley and the Melody Makers
This group, composed of Bob Marley’s four oldest children and led by eldest son Ziggy, had their biggest hit with this breezy reggae warning to always have love in your heart. More children of a legend with a long shadow over them, and they respond by just seeming loose and confident in what they’re doing. And it works.
27 - “Doctorin’ the Tardis,” The Timelords
Before most of their success as the KLF, pop pranksters Bill Drummond and Jimmy Cauty scored a #1 with this mashup of the theme from the British sci-fi institution Doctor Who and Gary Glitter’s “Rock and Roll Part Two.” Just more of the mad genius you get from the guys who actually burned a million pounds in cash.
26 - “Voyage Voyage,” Desireless
French singe Claudie Fritsch-Mentrop had her biggest international hit by singing in her native tongue about traveling around the world over dance beats. Not quite as much of a trip as the title promises.
25 - “Follow the Leader,” Eric B. and Rakim
New Yorkers Eric Barrier and William Griffin Jr. would create one of the most respected and revered rap catalogues during their short seven-year partnership, and they even managed three pop hits here, the last being this funk bomb. The bass shakes you, the groove moves you, and Rakim’s flow and wordplay will melt your brain. This is as good as rap gets. Everyone else is indeed following, to some extent.
24 - “Never Tear Us Apart,” INXS
The great rock ballad of the decade only got this high here. That is so wrong. So much wine could be made from my tears over this.
23 - “There’s More to Love,” The Communards
Ex-Bronski Beat frontman Jimmy Somerville named his next band after 1870s French socialists, and they sold pretty well to the masses, scoring nine Top 40s. The last one was this poppy declaration that “there’s more to love than boy meets girl.” A subtle but unmistakable message. Somerville was a master of sweetening the medicine.
22 - “Maybe (We Should Call it A Day),” Hazell Dean
The fourth hit for this Essex lady was this SAW creation about pondering a breakup. Okay, but just like with a lot of these, I find myself wondering if Kylie would do it better, and this one is an easy yes.
21 - “I Will Be with You,” T’Pau
The fifth hit for the Shropshireans named for a Vulcan was this power ballad about lasting devotion. Well short of the high standards set by “Heart and Soul” and “China in Your Hand.”
In Part Two: Girls, boys, kids, bros, and let’s throw in a monkey.
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