Wednesday, August 23, 2017

Bobby Goes Home: Canadian Top 50 August 9, 1986

1986.  This was the year Canada began negotiating a free trade agreement with the United States.  One was worked out, and eventually it expanded to include Mexico and become NAFTA.  That's being renegotiated right now, although one of the participants seems a little too distracted at the moment  to be in the right frame of mind for such sensitive talks.  I'll let you guess which one.  Meanwhile, up here, these were some of the hits.

Bonus Track:  #51 - "April Fool," Chalk Circle (CanCon!)
So I've decided that for these I'm going to throw in a song that was outside the Top 50 but I still want to cover.  And I'm starting with the first and biggest hit for a band from Newcastle, Ontario.  It's alt-rock that might be about worshipping false gods.  It's not too clear.  But it's good, in a junior U2 kind of way.

50 - "Song in My Head," M+M (CanCon!)
This band began as Martha and the Muffins in 1978, and two years later they picked up a Top Five here and a Top Ten in the U.K. with "Echo Beach."  They continued on through the decade, eventually shortening their name, and here we find them with their fifth and final Top 50.  It's catchy dance-rock about getting over a loser ex.  Not their best, but still a worthy hit, not just a quota-filler.

48 - "Say It, Say It," E.G. Daily
Born Elizabeth Guttman in Los Angeles, singer-actress Daily first got attention for playing Dottie, the love interest of the titular man-child in the 1985 film Pee-Wee's Big Adventure.  A year later she peaked in the 60s at home and the 40s here with this Madonna-esque dance pop tune encouraging a lover to make his feelings known.  Okay, but not distinctive.  No more hits followed, but in the next decade she found her greatest success doing voice work for cartoons.  You may have heard her as Tommy on Rugrats, or as Buttercup on The Powerpuff Girls.  She even tried to relaunch her music career in 2013 by competing on The Voice, but she lost in a knockout round.  I'm not sure why that happened, but maybe it's something I wouldn't understand.  Something I couldn't understand.  Something I shouldn't understand.

47 - "Bad Bad Boy," Haywire (CanCon!)
Almost certainly the biggest band to come from tiny Prince Edward Island, these guys had their first of five hits with this rock sex plea.  Not much.

39 - "Anything for Love," Gordon Lightfoot (CanCon!)
Gord's biggest hit of the decade is this love song that is overwhelmed by David Foster's production.  You could place Leonard Cohen in a bed of synths and drum machineset and it worked, because that voice sounded alien in any setting.  But Gord soundsounds like he walked in the wrong studio and they wouldn't let him out.

33 - "The Thin Red Line," Glass Tiger (CanCon!)
The Newmarket pop band had three hits in the U.S. from their debut album, but the title track only hit at home.  Not surprising, because it's about a Crimean war battle involving Scottish soldiers.  But I like it, because it's by far the most interesting thing they ever did.  And the subject matter wins it an Uneasy Rider.

32 - "Boy Inside the Man," Tom Cochrane and Red Rider (CanCon!)
Before going solo and hitting with "Life is a Highway," Cochrane led the band Red Rider, and hinted at his future breakaway beginning with this single.  It's a solid pop-rocker about hanging on to youthful dreams and enthusiasm.  Less prog than what had come before, but that's not to say that the new direction was necessarily better.

31 - "What Does it Take," Honeymoon Suite (CanCon!)
The Niagara Falls band's fourth Top 50 was this better-than-most power ballad.  It fell a little short of following its predecessor "Feel it Again," into the Top 40 in America.  Too bad.

28 - "How Many (Rivers to Cross)," Luba (CanCon!)
A Montrealer of Ukrainian descent, Lubomyra Kowalchyk was a consistent CanCon performer, picking up eight hits between 1983 and 1990.  The fourth was this pop-soul number about perseverance.  Her exceptionally strong voice carried her a long way, but not beyond our borders, unfortunately.

22 -"Suspicious Minds," Fine Young Cannibals
They didn't break America until three years later, but these guys did hit here with both their first U.K. Top 40s, including this cover of Elvis' 1969 comeback hit.  Not a huge departure from the original, but distinguished by Roland Gift's soulful delivery, as well as the backing falsetto of Jimmy Somerville, whose hits with Bronski Beat and the Communards we will encounter at some point.

20 - "Theme from Peter Gunn," The Art of Noise featuring Duane Eddy
The London electronic group had one of their biggest hits with a cover of Henry Mancini's theme to a late-50s U.S. TV detective series.  The twangy guitar is provided by rockabilly pioneer Eddy, who had a hit with the song himself over a quarter century earlier.  It all adds up to greatness.

19 - "Patio Lanterns," Kim Mitchell (CanCon!)
The pride of Sarnia, Ontario, Joseph Mitchell has gone by his middle name throughout his career, which began in the seventies with the band Max Webster and continued after the group's breakup in 1981.  His second major pop hit was this midtempo number about summer nights at teenage parties.  It perfectly captures the atmosphere of young people nervously approaching each other romantically.  I am going to name this as the first entry on my Official Glovehead Registry of CanConClassiscs.

17 - "The Best of Me," David Foster and Olivia Newthon-John (CanCon!)
Before Cliff Richard hit with it in Britain, the song's composer teamed up with ONJ on a version of his own.  Still goop, but I always like hearing Olivia.  Foster, meanwhile, is a capable...producer.

Top Ten of spaghetti, all covered with cheese.

10 - "On My Own," Patti LaBelle and Michael McDonald 
Still competent breakup balladry by a couple pros.  Only Britain kept it from a Triple Crown.

9 - "Invisible Touch," Genesis
The exact moment when the band became indistinguishable from Phil's solo stuff.

8 - "Danger Zone," Kenny Loggins 
Apparently this had not one but two chances to become at least partially CanCon, but both Bryan Adams and Corey Hart turned it down before it essentially defaulted to soundtrack king Loggins.  I think that was the best for all concerned.

7 - "Love Touch," Rod Stewart 
Oohyagonnagetta, oohyagonnagetta big thumbs down, Rod.  This is horrendous.

6 - "Glory of Love," Peter Cetera 
Pete decides that he can do a more overwrought ballad on his own than "If You Leave Me Now" and succeeds spectacularly.  There's no glory in that.

5 - "Who's Johnny," El Debarge 
Four movie hits in a row, ending with The Debarge's song about a robot who falls in love with Ally Sheedy.  The 80s, ladies and gentlemen.

4 - "I Can't Wait," Nu Shooz
I could have.  This did nothing for me.  But my country made it a #1.  Why?

3 - "Sledgehammer," Peter Gabriel 
Only Britain prevented it from a Triple Crown.  Pity, that.

2 - "We Don't Have to Take Our Clothes Off," Jermaine Stewart 
But we don't have to not take our clothes off, right?

And 31 years ago, Canada's charttopper was...
1 - "Papa Don't Preach," Madonna
This one did grab the Triple Crown. Timeless teen drama.

Back to England soon.  Ta.

Saturday, August 12, 2017

GATW: UKT40 August 4, 1973 Part Two

And the rest.

20 - "Snoopy vs. The Red Baron," Hotshots
This band was actually The Cimarons, one of Britain's first reggae bands, but their only home success came with a different name and a cover of The Royal Guardsmen's first, non-Christmas tale of Charles Schulz's beagles airborne rivalry with Manfred von Richtofen.  A fun little curio.

19 - "Born to Be With You," Dave Edmunds 
Welshman Edmunds had his third solo Top Ten with this cover of a 1956 Chordettes hit.  Coolly twangy.

18 - "You Can Do Magic," Limmie and Family Cookin'
From Canton, Ohio,  Limmie Snell and sisters Martha and Jimmie had their main success in the U.K., with their first of three hits being this soul-pop tune about a lover with a seemingly supernatural power to mend a broken heart.  Just great radio music.

17 - "Hypnosis," Mud
The glam rockers from Carsharlton had their second hit melding glam with tango on this song about being entranced by a lover.  I like it a lot, and I'm not being a hypnotistic liar.

16 - "Pillow Talk," Sylvia
Ms. Robinson, you're trying to seduce us.  And succeeding.

15 - "Skweeze Me Pleeze Me," Slade
Their fifth #1 is a sex boogie that is just them doing what they do very well, but it's a little off now hearing a line like "When a girl's meaning yes, she says no."  Um, no.  And by that I mean "no."

14 - "Saturday Night's Alright for Fighting," Elton John 
Just "alright?"  Does that mean that other evenings might be considered "very good" or "excellent" for fisticuffs?  If you ever read this, Sir Elton, please let me know.

13 - "Ying Tong Song," The Goons
The Goon Show was a popular 50s BBC Radio program that featured comedians Spike Milligan, Harry Secombe, and Peter Sellers.  Its outrageousness and irreverence inspired The Beatles and Monty Python, among many others.  The Goons also had a Top Ten hit in 1956 with this record, and it returned to those heights when it was reissued seventeen years later.  It's a delightfully anarchic piece containing random bits of singing and sound effects, all built around the nonsensical refrain "Ying Tong yiddle-I-po."  If you love Spike Jones, you'll love this as well.  And how could it be anything other than an Uneasy Rider?

12 - "Gaye," Clifford T. Ward
A former schoolteacher, Worcestershire native Gaye had the biggest of his two hits with this drippy ballad.  He sounds like a tired Roger Daltrey, and the lyrics are flowery tripe.  Whatever the opposite of an undiscovered gem is, this is it.

11 - "Bad Bad Boy," Nazareth 
The second of two Top Tens for the Scots rockers was this bluesy boast of gigolo prowess.  Very good.  Dan McCafferty's voice might be the missing link between Brian Johnson and Axl Rose, if that makes any sense.

10 - "Randy," Blue Mink
The last of seven hits for this glam pop group was this ode to an idealistic, apolitical musician.  Not sure if it was based on anyone.  This is good enough to make me look forward to keeping this up long enough to hear more from them.

9 - "Touch Me in the Morning," Diana Ross 
A #1 at home, but only #9 here.  I'm leaning Britain, but this grows on me with every listen.

8 - "Spanish Eyes," Al Martino 
Philadelphia native Jasper Cini had been recording since the early 50s, and while he was a chart regular for most of that time in America, over here there was an 18-years Top 40 drought that ended with this release of a 1965 U.S. Top Twenty about pledging love to a blue-eyed Mexican girl.  Decent crooner pop.  I imagine this sudden rediscovery was spurred in part by his appearance in The Godfather the previous year.  Getting slapped around by Marlon Brando was worth it, I suppose.

7 - "Yesterday Once More," The Carpenters 
Karen and Richard never topped the charts here, but this was the first of two #2s.  And it still shines.  Shooby doo lang lang.

6 - "48 Crash," Suzi Quatro 
Sooze's second hit was this song that may be a warning to men about what may happen when they have a midlife crisis.  Or it may have just been thrown together when its composers boasted they could write a song about anything and someone challeneed them to pen one about the 1848 United States economic crisis.  Though I'm not sure how either of these things could be described as a "silk sash bash."  Whatever, it sounds great coming out of Suzi Q.

5 - "Life on Mars," David Bowie 
His masterpiece.  Originally written to the same French song Paul Anka adapted for "My Way," it turned into this absurdist ballad about the contrast between fantasy and reality.  I think that's it, but really, I have no idea.  And it doesn't matter.  It's four minutes that grabs you, sucks you in, and takes you somewhere fascinating and enthralling.  Only the very best music can do that.

4 - "Goin' Home," The Osmonds 
The brothers' third Top Five here was this rocker about going to where you belong.  Because it was from the Mormon-themed LP The Plan, they may have meant heaven.  It's probably their most awkward attempt to rock.

3 - "Alright Alright Alright," Mungo Jerry
The fourth and final Top Five for the pride of Colpington was this ramshackle tune about trying to stay calm amid confusion.  Fun, and less annoying than "In the Summertime."

2 - "Welcome Home," Peters and Lee
Lennie Peters and Dianne Lee teamed up in 1970 and wound up with three hits, including a #1 with their debut, this blah MOR reconciliation number.  Peters sings lead, and sounds too much like Engelbert Humperdinck for me to like him.  And to think he's Charlie Watts' uncle.

And on top 44 years ago was...
1 - "I'm the Leader of the Gang (I Am)," Gary Glitter 
Old Creepy had his first #1 with this song that's fun if you can forget what a scumbag he is.  Nobody with any decency wants to be in your gang anymore, pal.  Enjoy dying in prison.

Until next time, y'all

Friday, August 4, 2017

GATW: UKT40 August 4, 1973 Part One

August 1973.  A new football season was about to kick off.  Meanwhile, in the ongoing competition that is the pop charts, this was how the table looked.

40 - "I Saw the Light," Todd Rundgren 
Brilliant romantic pop from the Philly native.  Top Twenty at home, only #36 here.  Britain, you fucked up.

39 - "See My Baby Jive," Wizzard
A repeater from a previous visit.  Still a great glam moment.

38 - "Peek-a-Boo," The Stylistics
Philly soul that's supposed to be about endearing romantic admiration, but now sounds a bit like stalking.  But I don't feel like their intentions were nefarious, so I would just recommend a different strategy.

37 - "Smarty Pants," First Choice
More from Philadelphia, this time with a proto-disco number about a woman who can get any man she wants, but it backfires and she ends up pregnant by a man who doesn't stand by her.  Ah, the still-regressive sexual politics of less than fifty years ago.

36 - "Rising Sun," Medicine Head 
The third of four hits for the Stafford group is this solid rocker about love and the open road and stuff.  A good song to slip onto a summer classic rock playlist.

35 - "Rock-a-Doodle-Doo," Linda Lewis 
Born Linda Fredericks  in the West Ham area of London, this singer scored the first of four Top 40s with this soul-rocker about wanting to do certain things to a certain someone.  Hey, there are only so many ways to describe the same premise.  Very good song, even better singer.

34 - "Dancin' on a Saturday Night," Barry Blue
The first and biggest hit for the man ironically born Barry Green was this happy pop tune about inviting a lady out for some weekend rug-cutting.   Pretty good retro-glam.

33 - "Honaloochie Boogie," Mott the Hoople 
Mott's second U.K. hit was this celebration of rocking out thaillt uses similar slang to what was used in "All the Young Dudes."  And yes, phrases like "screwdriver jiver" and "spider westsider" still sound cool now.

32 - "Summer (The First Time)," Bobby Goldsboro 
This tale of teenager-on-older-woman action brought the G-man his second Top Ten here.  I still think it's weird to hear this from the "Watching Scotty Grow" guy.  And I still object to rhyming "julep" with "two lips."

31 - "I'm Doin' Fine Now," New York City
This group's biggest moment was this transatlantic Top 20 about finally being over someone.  Your basic Philly-style soul, well-delivered.

30 - "Tie a Yellow Ribbon Round the Ole Oak Tree," Dawn
Once again, Tony Orlando's out of jail and hoping his lover waited for him.  Spoiler alert: she did.

29 - "Live and Let Die," Paul McCartney and Wings 
I'm calling it once and for all: this is the best Bond theme.  Paul had a job to do, and he did it well.

28 - "Finders Keepers," Chairmen of the Board
The last hit here for this Michigan soul band was this meaty slab of funk about loving a woman someone else took for granted.  Fabulous.  I didn't know I needed to hear this, but clearly I did.

27 - "And I Love You So," Perry Como 
And the feeling still isn't mutual, Perry, even on your third attempt.

26 - "Albatross," Fleetwood Mac 
In their original, blues oriented form, with guitarists Peter Green and Danny Kirwan joining the rhythm section of Mick Fleetwood and John McVie, this band hit #1 in 1968 with this languid instrumental, and a re-release five years later hit #2.  Meanwhile, the band were in their awkward transition phase thathe culminated with the hiring of a couple of Americans and a move toward pop.  I forget how that worked out.

25 - "Step by Step," Joe Simon
Louisianan Simon was a fixture on the U.S. pop and soul charts for much if the 60s and 70s, but his only hit on the other side of the Atlantic was this song about wanting to know and love a woman in spite of a negative reputation.  This guy is an R&B reliable, and I'm surprised the soul-loving U.K. missed the boat on him.

24 - "Rubber Bullets," 10cc
Their second hit and first of three #1s was this jaunty tale of a scenario similar to that of Elvis' "Jailhouse Rock," but with more rioting and resistance from authority.  It's just so good, and my favorite part is the section where the sheriff threatens the inmates that sounds like something off of the Beach Boys' Pet Sounds.  Again I say, these guys are among the best pop groups ever.  Every new exposure confirms that.

23 - "The Free Electric Band," Albert Hammond 
Gibraltar native Hammond has the rare distinction of being a one-hit wonder in the U.S. and the U.K. with two different songs.  Instead of "It Never Rains in Southern California," Britain got this tune about a guy rejecting a straight suburban life for rock n’roll.  It's better than the one I'm more familiar with.  Glad I found it.

22 - "Take Me to the Mardi Gras," Paul Simon 
This wasn't a single in America, but here it became his second Top Ten.  It's a midtempo acoustic number about escaping your troubles in New Orleans.  For parts of this hemail adopts a Frankie Valli-ish voice for some reason.  Other than that, very good.

21 - "All Right Now," Free
I think this is the third time we've encountered this in Britain alone.  And it's still gritty greatness with a twist.  All right already.

In Part Two: dogfights, nonsense, and what could be Matthew McConaghey's theme song, if he wanted one.