20 - "Far Away," Nickelback
19 - "Shortie Like Mine," Bow Wow featuring Chris Brown and Johnta Austin
18 - "This Ain't a Scene, It's an Arms Race," Fall Out Boy
17 - "Lips of an Angel," Hinder
16 - "Waiting on the World to Change," John Mayer
The second half begins with more Nickelback. It's a big ballad about undying love. This is them at their most blandly commercial.
Bow Wow, five years removed from starring in Like Mike, is here with one of his biggest hits. Basic rap about how fine his lady is. Nothing special, and a certain presence makes it even less so.
Next is Fall Out Boy with their highest charting pop hit, a catchy little rocker on which songwriter Pete Wentz compares their music to weaponry. Not sure why. Still, it might be their best song.
Then it's the biggest hit for Oklahoma post-grungers Hinder. It's a droney power ballad about talking to another woman while your girlfriend's in the next room. For some reason, singer Austin Winkler delivers this lyric while sounding quite constipated. Or maybe that's his regular singing voice. I'm not interested enough to confirm or deny this.
This section closes out with John Mayer decrying war and injustice and corruption and stuff over loungey lite-funk. If this is the kind of music you think can change the world, Johnny, I'm afraid you're going to be waiting quite a while.
15 - "Smack That," Akon featuring Eminem
14 - "Runaway Love," Ludacris featuring Mary J. Blige
13 - "The Sweet Escape," Gwen Stefani featuring Akon
12 - "Welcome to the Black Parade," My Chemical Romance
11 - "My Love," Justin Timberlake featuring T.I.
This bunch is led off by Senegalese-American singer Akon, singing about girls dancing. Eminem chips in with an okay rap. He's done well as an artist, but his most significant accomplishment, one might argue, was helping introduce the world to one Lady Gaga.
Ludacris makes his second appearance this week with a serious track that tells the tales of three young girls between the ages of 9-11 and the tragic situations that cause them to leave home. He does the subject matter justice, and the soulful conrtibutions of Mary J. add to the impact. A solid detour for Mr. Bridges.
Next is Gwen Stefani. Once again, I liked the single that preceded the one I'm covering much better (in this case, the delightfully daft, "Lonely Goatherd" riffing "Wind it Up."). But this has a cool little 60s girl group in outer space vibe that's undeniably charming. And Akon co-wrote this in addition to contributing some backing vocals. That's more money for that guy.
Then it's New Jersey emo stars My Chemical Romance with their biggest hit, a song about a father who puts a lot of pressure on his son after taking him to watch a marching band. "Would you be the saviour of the beaten, the broken and the damned?" he asks the child. Couldn't he just let the kid enjoy the bloody parade and then lay that heavy stuff on him later? Anyway, it's a big, bold, dramatic rock song, the kind of thing one thought might not be heard on pop radio again after the heyday of Queen. But it did, and so I've decided that MCR will share this week's Uneasy Rider with Panic! at the Disco. And if they can't share, let the guyliner fly.
And the last stop before the Top Ten is manned by Justin Timberlake on this synth-heavy tribute to romantic stuff like walking on the beach and writing love notes. T.I's rap is okay, but really, it's all about JT and his falsetto. Like him or not, he's as star.
The Top Ten makes it all better.
10 - "How to Save a Life," The Fray
These Denver soft rockers had their biggest hit with this sleepy song about trying to help someone who may be beyond salvation. I think their hearts are in the right place, but this song just doesn't do much for me. Sorry.
9 - "Fergalicious," Fergie
Oh, it's never good when you think you're so awesome that you have to make up new adjectives to describe yourself. There's a charm to it's old-school hip-hop backing track, but both "Fergie Ferg"'s rhymes and flow are pretty terrible. Tastes quite Fergasour to me.
8 - "It Ends Tonight," The All-American Rejects
I still don't know how these guys have done as well as they have. This whiny ballad doesn't clear up that mystery at all. Simple Plan do this sort of thing much better, and that's not saying much.
7 - "Break it Off," Rihanna featuring Sean Paul
The Barbadian picked up her fifth Top Ten with this collaboration with fellow Caribbean native Sean Paul. It's sexy and dancehally. Doesn't do it for me. But it does go to show that she was already poised for superstardom. A few months later, a litlle song about raingear would push her over the edge.
6 - "It's Not Over," Daughtry
As the fifth season of American Idol went on, it seemed more and more apparent that the series' "rocker" Chris Daughtry was the likely winner. However, on the episode where the final four were cut down to three, Daughtry stunningly received the fewest votes and was eliminated. Despite this setback, he quickly found himself invited to try out to be the new lead singer of the band Fuel. He was flattered, but instead formed his own eponymous band. Their debut CD went multiplatinum, thanks in large part to the success of the lead single, a rock ballad about wanting a second chance. This is similar to quite a few other songs, but Daughty's vocals seem to push it ahead of that mediocre pack. He has gone on to be one of Idol's bigger success stories. As for the three who finished ahead of him, Elliot Yamin has had a hit or two, Katharine McPhee is on that Smash show, and Taylor "Soul Patrol" Hicks is apparently a Las Vegas headliner.
5 - "I Wanna Love You," Akon featuring Snoop Dogg
Akon again, this time assisted by Snoop on a track about trying to attract a stripper. Yes, romance was alive and well in 2007. Make it rain.
4 - "Walk Away (Remember Me)," Paula DeAnda
Texas teen DeAnda had her only major hit to date with this pop trifle on which she her asks ex if his new girlfriend knows about his penchant for playing video games deep into the night. But maybe he doesn't do that anymore. And maybe there's a reason. But the song doesn't explore that further. That's probably for the best.
3 - "What Goes Around...Comes Around," Justin Timberlake
Timberlake makes his third appearance this week with this song that's both musically and thematically similar to "Cry Me a River." That's a better song, but this is no slouch.
2 - "Say it Right," Nelly Furtado
After the more personal and reflective Folklore flopped, Furtado hooked up with Timbaland and transformed herself into a dance diva. The resulting CD, Loose, returned her to multiplatinum status. I wasn't a fan of this change, but I must admit that I like the third single, this spare, sultry cry of romantic denial. Her most recent album was another left turn, and like Folklore, it stiffed. What will she do now?
And on top six years ago was...
1 - "Irreplaceable," Beyoncé
The unstoppable B topped the pops for the fourth time with this strutting kiss-off about kicking out a cheating loser while knowing that she can do much better. "I can find another you in a minute, matter fact, he'll be here in a minute," she sang, and no one doubted her. By this time, we all knew 'bout her. And the line of her admirers was long as it formed "to the left, to the left."
Next time: it's so 2008, so don't be two thousand and late.
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