Sunday, March 11, 2012

March 12, 1988 Part Two

Before we close '88, let's have a little glimpse at the action from March 12, 1977.

Barbra Streisand was on top with "Evergreen." Below her, the Top Ten included favorites like "Blinded by the Light," "Dancing Queen," "Rich Girl," and "Go Your Own Way"...The first newbie is at #12, "Boogie Child" by the Bee Gees. It was their attempt at more of a straight-up funk number, rather than disco. Honestly, I think it's borderline embarrassing. But they would rebound from this. Would they ever...Boston had their second hit with "Long Time," this week at #22. I'm sure some classic rock station somewhere is playing it right now...At #24, George Harrison invites you to "Crackerbox Palace." From the sounds of it, it seems like quite an odd place, but I'd still go if I had the chance...Elton John is here with an invitation for people in various American locales to "move that muscle and shake that fat" on "Bite Your Lip (Get Up and Dance)" at #26. Isn't that also sometimes called "The White Man's Overbite?"...Five years after his first hit, "Doctor My Eyes," Jackson Browne finally picked up his second with this week's #27, "Here Come Those Tears Again," It's sensitive balladry about missing a lost love, typical of his work...Olivia Newton-John is at #32 with a ballad on which she pines for a man named "Sam." I remember it from back in the day, and even then, it wasn't one of my favorites of hers...At 33 we find ELO with "Do Ya," a song that was originally recorded in 1971 by Jeff Lynne's old band, The Move. A catchy rock song about how a woman is more amazing to him than all the other sights he's seen in his life. One of their more underrated hits...Future Johnny Mathis duet partner and "Let's Hear It for the Boy" charttopper Deneice Williams is at #34 with her first hit, "Free." It's a midtempo seduction tune in which she tries to entice a lover with her "magic potion of love." I can't begin to speculate what that might contain...Detroit soulsters Enchantment had their first of two pop hits with the ballad "Gloria," this week's #36. Nice, but nothing that sticks to the mind...And Rufus featuring Chaka Khan do their usual funky thing, promising nocturnal pleasures on the very good "At Midnight (My Love Will Lift You Up)" at #39...But this week, the BGC spotlight falls on...

19 - "Say You'll Stay Until Tomorrow," Tom Jones
The Welshman had been a steady presence on the charts, and on television, and in Las Vegas for over a decade, but by the mid-70s, his popularity was waning. But unlike many declining acts who tried to stay relevant by hopping on the disco bandwagon, Tommy opted to give country a try. The result, this solid plea for a departing lover to just give him one more chance, not only topped the country charts, but returned hit to the pop Top 40 for the first time in five years. He would never return on his own (though he did slip on in 1988 on The Art of Noise's Prince cover, "Kiss"), but this did open the door to a brief but accomplished (seven Top 40 singles) country career in the 80s.

Okay, now let's zip ahead eleven years and take care of business.

20 - "Hungry Eyes," Eric Carmen
19 - "Girlfriend," Pebbles
18 - "What Have I Done to Deserve This," The Pet Shop Boys with Dusty Springfield
17 - "(Sittin' On) The Dock of the Bay," Michael Bolton
16 - "Rocket 2 U," The Jets


The second half kicks off with Eric Carmen's peckish optic organs. I believe I've said before that it sucks, so let's move on.

Perri Anne McKissick conducted her musical career under her childhood nickname, first with the band Con Funk Shun, and later as a solo artist. Her first hit on her own is this sassy bit of advice to a friend to dump her roaming lover, because "he's just a canine runnin' round in heat." The best of her handful of hits. She didn't have a long recording career, but she have later success as a writer and producer. Speaking of the latter, she married the co-producer of this record, Antonio "L.A." Reid. They divorced in 1996. Too bad.

Next are the Pet Shop Boys and Dusty Springfield, back one more time on their collaborative breakup lament. Still masterful pop.

Then it's Michael Bolton with his second hit, a pointless, needless, overwrought, overproduced, just plain awful desecration of Otis Redding's soul standard. If you've never heard it, consider yourself lucky.

This section is closed by the Minneapolis-based Wolfgramm siblings with another Top Ten dance-popper in which the singer declares that his lover shouldn't call him when her TV, car, or plumbing isn't working. He can't fix those things, or anything else mechanical, but he can "fix" her. Whatever he means by that. And I'm not sure why there are rockets involved. She's probably better off just not calling this guy at all.

15 - "Be Still My Beating Heart," Sting
14 - "Hysteria," Def Leppard
13 - "Love Overboard," Gladys Knight and the Pips
12 - "Get Outta My Dreams, Get Into My Car," Billy Ocean
11 - "I Found Someone," Cher


This section opens with a returning Sting ballad about reluctance in romance. It's still pretty good. I have no more to add.

Def Leppard follow with the title track to their most successful album. It's a midtempo rocker about a love that they describe as "a magical mysteria." I don't think that's a real thing, but whatever, it became their first Top Ten hit, and it's a decent song, so I'll allow it.

Next are Gladys and her Pips, back from last time with a song about drowning in desire. There are worse ways to go, I suppose. And I wouldn't mind if Gladys happened to be the one to sing me out of this mortal coil.

Then it's Billy Ocean's third and final American #1, a fun bit of synthetic funk in which Billy invites a woman into his automobile so he can be her "non-stop lover" It's silly, but impossible to hate. But when you think about it, it is pretty amazing that this guy had three Number One hits. It's one of those things that doesn't sound true but is. Like "the two-time World Series Champion Florida Marlins."

Last in this bunch is Cher and her power ballad about discovering a new love. I wonder if Sonny thought "I'm happy for her" whenever he heard it. I imagine he did. They were pretty amicable by this point.

Before the Sweet Sixteen, the Elite Eight, and the Final Four, there was the Top Ten.

10 - "Can't Stay Away from You," Gloria Estefan and Miami Sound Machine
The Latin pop outfit continued their run of hits with a pretty ballad about not wanting to let go of a relationship even though one knows it's going to end sometime. Just okay, but eleveated somewhat by Gloria's voice. She was really starting to emerge as one of pop's better singers.

9 - "I Want Her," Keith Sweat
Yes, that's still his real name. And it's still a high-grade, lusty rump-shaker.

8 - "Out of the Blue," Debbie Gibson
Debbie G. returns with one of her sweetest pieces of ear candy. And I don't care if she is 41 now, I'm still not going to call her Deborah. Hey, Debbie Reynolds is almost twice her age, and she never gets uptight about it.

7 - "Man in the Mirror," Michael Jackson
The fourth #1 from Bad was this anthemic ballad about how changing the world starts with changing yourself. Employing a gospel choir to sing backup was an obvious move, but still a very effective one. Songs like this aren't normally my thing, but I can't deny that this is extremely well-crafted, and it comes off as very genuine and un-cynical. And there's plenty of room for that in the world.

6 - "Just Like Paradise," David Lee Roth
DLR returns from last time, having a ball in a very corporate-rock sort of way. This is where, for me, the novelty of him as a solo act wore off.

5 - "Endless Summer Nights," Richard Marx
I'll say this for Richie-boy: he's better than Eric Carmen. Michael Bolton, too. That's probably all he can expect from me in terms of praise when he's in ballad mode.

4 - "I Get Weak," Belinda Carlisle
As did I, Belinda, watching you in videos during your Go-Gos days. Jane Wiedlin did have an understated sex appeal, but clearly Belinda was the bombshell.

3 - "She's Like the Wind," Patrick Swayze
Stop exposing your tree to the wind, Patrick! There are laws against that sort of thing!

2 - "Father Figure," George Michael
In which George promises to "be your preacher, teacher, anything you have in mind." Well, what if I need an accountant? Can you do my taxes, George? Or do I have to call in Ridgeley? He's probably less busy anyway.

And on top of pop 24 years ago was...

1 - "Never Gonna Give You Up," Rick Astley
The first of two U.S. charttoppers for the man from Lancashire. I'm not sure how he feels about the odd way in which this song has gained new life, but if there's been new money to go along with it, I'm sure he's dealing with it.

The NotCaseys were "Going Back to Cali" by LL Cool J, "Pamela" by Toto, "One Step Up" by Bruce Springsteen, and "Pink Cadillac" by Natalie Cole. And there was just one LDD: A sixteen-year-old half-Vietnamese girl dedicated Linda Ronstadt and James Ingram's "Somewhere Out There" to the American father she had, to that point, never known.

And that is that. And soon, there will be more of this.

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