Thursday, May 12, 2016

Gloves Across The Water: U.K. Top 40 May 5, 1973 Part Two

The end of '73.

20 - "And I Love You So," Perry Como
The laid back one's last U.S. top 40 and final U.K. Top Five.  I'd better move on from this while I'm still awake.

19 - "Good Grief Christina," Chicory Tip
Named for a coffee additive, this Kent band had a handful of hits in the early 70s, including this pop-rocker about a girl who just can't get into rock music.  If the stuff she's exposed to is like this sub-Bay City Rollers blob, I can't say I blame her.

18 - "The Twelfth of Never," Donny Osmond
1972 and 1973 were the peak of Osmond-mania in Britain, as Donny was a constant presence on the charts both alone and with his brothers.  His second of three #1s was this cover of a Johnny Mathis hit about undying love.  I definitely prefer him at this stage, after the voice changed.  I'll be reminded of what a prepubescent Osmond sounds like a little later.

17 - "Amanda," Stewart Gillies
Don't know much about this guy, accept that he was discovered on a talent show called Opportunity Knocks, he had a hit with this Andy Williams-ish orchestral ballad, and you can book him through a company called Champions Music and Entertainment.  News you can use.  Oh, and the beginning reminds me a lot of the theme from The Young and the Restless, aka "Nadia's Theme."

16 - "Big Eight," Judge Dread
Alex Hughes was born in Kent in 1945, and as a teenager moved to the Brixton section of London, where he was exposed to the burgeoning reggae scene.  In the late 60s, he became a DJ, and worked as a debt collector for the British reggae label Trojan, and soon afterward he tried his hand at music himself (using a name inspired by a popular British comic book character), going on to become the first white artist to have a reggae hit in Jamaica.  His third Top 40 hit (following "Big Six" and "Big Seven") follows the pattern of its predecessors in taking nursery rhymes and turning them into thinly veiled sexual innuendoes.  So thinly veiled, in fact, that these songs reached their lofty chart positions entirely due to sales, as they were banned from airplay.  And even by modern standards, they're pretty raunchy.  You may never think of Mary, Mary quite so contrarily again.  Anyway, this was my introduction to another piece of pop history I knew nothing about, and the good Judge (who died of a heart attack shortly after a performance in 1998) gets this charts Uneasy Rider.  And I'm sure he's having a good chuckle somewhere about the name of that particular honor.

15 - "Crazy," Mud
These London glam-rockers had their biggest success in the mid-70s, beginning with this single, a fuzzy, catchy tune about being in love with a younger girl.  Bigger hits were to come, and this one intrigues me enough to eventually want to look those up.

14 - "Pyjamarama," Roxy Music
Known for their stylishly-dressed singer Bryan Ferry and their penchant for putting attractive women on their album covers, this band had their second Top Ten with this catchy, pre-New Wave pop shuffle that features some odd yet somehow perfect saxophone work.  No mention of pyjamas, but that doesn't really affect the song one way or another.

13 - "No More Mr. Nice Guy," Alice Cooper
Vincent Furnier and his tale of becoming a pariah.  I'd like to think that the vast majority of pastors wouldn't punch a parishioner regardless of what they did, a la Reverend Smithee. 

12 - "My Love," Paul McCartney and Wings
Paul and his flight aids, singing about someone who "does it good."  Cheeky.

11 - "Giving it All Away," Roger Daltrey
The Who frontman's first solo single was this ballad co-written by the then-unknown Leo Sayer.  It's about regretting youthful mistakes.  I can certainly relate, which is probably why I like it so much.

10 - "I'm a Clown/Some Kind of  a Summer," David Cassidy
TV's Keith Partridge was becoming a teen idol in his own right at this time, and his following was even more rabid in Britain than it was at home.  This double-sided hit was the third of his four U.K. Top Fives.  The A side is a ballad based on the Pagliacci archetype of the funny man masking his pain.  Song's okay, but his breathy heartthrob delivery makes it come across less serious than it should.  The B is a little more upbeat, reminiscing about a road trip across America he took with a former lover during the hottest season.  Better, and it's the one of the two that I could have imagined being incorporated into the show.  You can almost see Shirley Jones at a keyboard while you listen to it.

9 - "Brother Louie," Hot Chocolate
These guys again, this time with the Top Ten original version of the song Stories would take to #1 in the U.S. later this year.  Sounds very similar, except for a soulful vocal opposed to a Rod Stewart-sounding one, and a couple of spoken word parts that portray racism from the families of both sides of the couple.  Both versions are well worth listening to.

8 - "Get Down," Gilbert O'Sullivan
The second U.K. #1 for one of the most unlikely pop stars anyway.  Still can't figure out if it's about a woman or a dog, still don't care.

7 - "All Because of You," Geordie
Named after the nickname for residents of their hometown of Newcastle, this band had the second and biggest of their four hits with this blues-rock stomper about a man changed for the better by love.  At first the singer sounds kind of like a British John Fogerty, but then in the parts when he lets loose he becomes fully identifiable as Brian Johnson, the man who, seven years later, would take over from the late Bon Scott in AC/DC.  And now Johnson himself has been replaced, at least temporarily, with none other than Axl Rose.  The circle of rock.

6 - "See My Baby Jive," Wizzard
Founded in Birmingham by Roy Wood, who had co-founded The Move and later Electric Light Orchestra, these glam rockers went to #1 with their second hit, a heavily arranged, early-60s-ish pop song purposely crafted to sound like one of Phil Spector's "Wall of Sound" production.  The lyric and overall sound make it a very good homage.  I think had I grown up in Britain, my two-year-old ears would have ben quite drawn to a lot of the glam rock of the day.

5 - "Tweedle Dee," Little Jimmy Osmond
Osmond-mania was so big in Britain that even the main brothers' ten-year-old sibling became a superstar, hitting #1 with the old-fashioned trifle "Long-Haired Lover from Liverpool."  The follow-up was this too cute cover of a 1954 LaVern Baker R&B hit.  I actually get pain in my teeth listening to this stuff.

4 - "Hell Raiser," Sweet
One of the biggest glam rock bands of the era, these Londoners had the fourth of a run of six straight Top Fives with this fast catchy rocker about a very hot lady.  It inspires me to break out the Headbangometer again, on which it registers three and a half stars.

3 - "Drive-In Saturday," David Bowie
Bowie's third U.K. Top Five was this midtempo rocker that's apparently about a future where people have forgotten how to reproduce, and thus have to watch porn from the past to learn how it's done.  Strange subject matter for most, but par for the course for Bowie.  Of course it's great.

2 - "Hello Hello I'm Back Again," Gary Glitter
Paul Gadd was a glam superstar during this period.  Now he's a convicted and incarcerated pedophile.  Hopefully he never gets a chance to say this again.  We don't miss you now you're gone.

And on top over there 43 years ago was...

1 - "Tie a Yellow Ribbon 'Round the Ole Oak Tree," Tony Orlando and Dawn
Tony and his lady friends with their song about a returning prisoner who finds that his lover has indeed waited for him.  How I'm sure the guy from the Tom Jones song hopes things will turn out. 

Another done.  But I'm not.  I'm a pop cockroach, and I'll crawl back with more soon.

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