Big finish
20 - "Rock the Night," Europe
The follow-up to "The Final Countdown." They didn't rock any night as well as they soundtracked the last seconds before that microwave popcorn was ready. Ah, Geico, resurrecting figures from the 80s that would otherwise be lost to history. It's what they do. My life wasn't complete until I learned how excited Ickey Woods is by cold cuts.
19 - "Stand by Me," Ben E. King
More revived old soul, but this happened on both sides of the pond, thanks to the movie. A sequel wouldn't be a good idea, but I would pay to see a spinoff film featuring Lard Ass Hogan getting more and more revenge on his haters.
18 - "Running in the Family," Level 42
From the Isle of Wight, the British island where Paul McCartney said he wanted to rent a summer cottage when he was of a certain age, these jazzy popsters hit the Top 40 twenty times here compared to just twice in the States. This was their last single to even reach the Hot 100 there, peaking at #83, whereas at home it was their third of six Top Tens. I think the Brits got it right. This is bouncy synth-pop about the fun and consequences of sneaking out of the house and getting up to no good, and respecting the parental point of view with the passage of time. Easily my favorite by these guys.
17 - "Behind the Mask," Eric Clapton
It had been nine years since Slowhand had cracked the 40 in his homeland when he broke through with a song that was originally by Japanese electronic pioneers Yellow Magic Orchestra, who wrote it in 1978 for a watch commercial. This version contains new lyrics written by none other than Michael Jackson, depicting a cheating lover. It's slick pop, kinda catchy. But I'd like to hear the original.
16 - "C'est La Vie," Robbie Nevil
The future songsmith behind Hannah Montana's biggest hit was Top #5 on both sides of the Atlantic. Its sophisticated white funk fits in well with some of the British-only hits here, so I'm not surprised.
15 - "Is This Love," Alison Moyet
We encountered the Essex-born former Yazoo singer in America with her only hit there, the powerful "Invisible." This, the fourth of here five Top Tens at home, is slick synthpop about a complicated relationship. It was produced and co-written by Eurythmics' Dave Stewart, and it shows. Moyet is a vastly different singer than Annie Lennox, but this still works well for her. I am shocked, however, that "Invisible didn't even go Top 20 here.
14 - "Once Bitten Twice Shy," Vesta
The daughter of a DJ from Coshocton, Ohio, Vesta Williams did her time singing backup for a wide range of artists before getting a record deal in 1986. Over the next five years, she would score six Top Tens on the U.S. R&B charts, but she never cracked the Top 40 on the Hot 100, and her only major hit in Britain was this soul-popper comparing romantic travails to vampirism ("Your name is Dracula, you suck the life out of me."). Snappy and cool. Sadly, Williams died from a heart condition in September 2011 at only 53 years old.
13 - "No More the Fool," Elkie Brooks
Born Elaine Bookbinder in Lancashire, Brooks' older brother drummed for the British Invasion footnotes Billy J. Kramer and the Dakotas, and she followed him into music, first gaining notice with the R&B group Vinegar Joe, whose lineup also contained Robert Palmer. She then went solo in the mid-70s, and she scored 7 Top 40s between 1977 and 1987, the biggest of which being this heartbreak ballad. Her voice lands somewhere between Bonnie Tyler and Alison Moyet, and she uses it to great effect. I'm certainly interested in hearing more.
12 - "Shoplifters of the World Unite," The Smiths
My introduction to this highly influential Manchester band came in 1985, but it wasn't through their music, but rather their T-shirts, most notably ones depicting the cover of their album Meat is Murder. But the majority of those shirts were worn by people much higher on the high school popularity food chain than I, so my opinion of them was colored in a negative way before I heard a note. It was in the summer of 1986 when I first heard "Please Please Please Let Me Get What I Want," and while I appreciated Morrissey's artfully anguished desire to finally have something he desired, I still hesitated to get into them more, wondering if perhaps too much of that voice would grate on me. It was years later before I looked more closely, and now I fully appreciate what a special thing they had going. In their homeland, however, attention was not a problem, as they had fifteen Top 40 singles between 1983 and 1987, and Morrissey grabbed plenty of headlines with his opinions about meat, monarchy, and Margaret Thatcher. Their 11th big hit was this midtempo rocker that apparently isn't a plead for a unionization of the planet's petty thieves, but more about taking the things around you and using them to your own benefit. The singing's convincing, and Johnny Marr's sparkling guitar stands out. One of their best. Later that year they would release their final album, and what has followed has included lawsuits, Marr forming and joining multiple bands, and Morrissey embarking on a solo career and remaining a viable touring act to this day, despite his continued penchant to say outrageous and offensive things almost every time he is given a forum to do so. He's definitely in my "he makes good and sometimes great music, but..." pile.
11 -"Stay Out of My Life," Five Star
The five Pearson siblings from Essex became a pop band in the mid-80s under the management of their father Buster, a Jamaican-born musician and music executive. They had some success in the U.S., with a hand full of R&B Top 40s and a pop #41 in "Can't Wait Another Minute." At home they had a hot streak that gave them fifteen Top 40s between '85 and '88. The penultimate of their six Top Tens was this jazzy popper about finding out about a lovers unfaithfulness. Not bad, not special. More like Two and a Half Star.
10 - "You Sexy Thing," Hot Chocolate
The one they will always be remembered for. I do believe in miracles, and, on an unrelated note, where are you from, you...attractive object?
9 - "Male Stripper," Man 2 Man meet Man Parrish
New York brothers Paul and Miki Zone started out in the mid-70s in a rock band called The Fast, but became more of a dance/club music act in the early 80s and changed their name. /Their one major moment came with this collaboration with producer Manuel Parrish, a throbbing techno number about a "ladies' night Adonis" who entertains in "hot cop drag," and for whom "tips in my G-string made my living." It's suitably sleazy, and a club classic. Sadly, shortly before it peaked on the U.K. charts, Miki Zone died of AIDS-related spinal meningitis. Paul continued recording under the name "Man to Man," but he never reached these heights again. But now, he and his brother will be immortalized by me as an Uneasy Rider.
8 - "Jack Your Body," Steve "Silk" Hurley
Chicagoan Hurley originally pursued a career in engineering, but decided to switch to music full time at age 19. Five years later, he was an accomplished radio DJ and producer who was one of the key founders of house music, and this minimally-lyriced floor filler would top the charts here for two weeks. Definitely the superior of this week's "jack" songs. Hurley wouldn't release much under his own name after this, but he would have a prolific career as a producer and remixer to the stars.
7 - "The Music of the Night/Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again," Michael Crawford/Sarah Brightman
Only months after its premiere on London's West End in October of 1986, Andrew Lloyd Webber's musical version of Gaston Leroux's novel about a disfigured composer's obsession with a young singer was already a phenomenon, and this was the second single from the cast album to hit the Top Ten. Side A, sung by Crawford as the phantom, is his attempt to seduce the object of his desire, Christine, into becoming his muse and perhaps more. The B, by Brightman's Christine, is sung at her father's grave as she pleads for his guidance to help her through the entanglement she finds herself in. I had heard the former several times, and it is what it is, and it was clearly effective in selling people on the charms of the whole enterprise. The latter was new to me, and I thought it was nice, although I spent much of it thinking about how far Brightman had come from the days of "I Lost My Heart to a Starship Trooper." Anyway, the show would be on Broadway a year from this time, and would become the longest-running production there ever. It also had a long run in Toronto, during which none other than Kiss' Paul Stanley donned the iconic mask. However, Webber's attempt at a sequel, Love Never Dies, flopped a few years ago. All he asked of the public was to love it, but they didn't. Too bad.
6 - "I Love My Radio," Taffy
New York singer Katherine Quaye had her only major success with a song about enjoying a disc jockey's work. It was produced by an Italian, and was bigger there than anywhere else. Not much more interesting to say. It's pop, it's okay, we're done.
5 - "It Doesn't Have to be This Way," The Blow Monkeys
These guys are best known for their only American hit, the wonderfully subversive "Digging Your Scene." At home, they had a few more hits, the biggest of which was this sophisticated funk-pop about romantic trials and tribulations. It's cool. Though I'm guessing that the band most profitable venture was their cover of Lesley Gore's "You Don't Own Me" from the Dirty Dancing soundtrack. If they had a nickel for every copy that record has sold...they'd have over $1.5 million. I wonder if that's above or below the actual royalty they get. Hmmmm...
4 - "Almaz," Randy Crawford
Georgia-born jazz singer Crawford only charted in America with the Crusaders on "Street Life," but had a handful of hits here, including two top fives. The second of these was this ballad Crawford wrote about her neighbors, a Ethiopian refugee couple, the wife of which had a name that meant "diamond." It's a sweet, affecting depiction of boundless love. Definitely a hidden almaz.
3 - "Down to Earth," Curiosity Killed the Cat
These Londoners were yet another band on the "sophist-pop" scene, and this was the beginning of a brief but successful run of hits for them. It's cool slick pop about not wanting a lover to drag one down with them. Very nice.
2 - "Heartache," Pepsi and Shirlie
Helen "Pepsi" DeMacque and Shirlie Holliman were first brought together as backing singers for Wham! (You will likely remember them dancing in "Choose Life" shirts from the "Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go," video). After the boys broke up, they had a brief career on their own, and this was the first of their two Top Tens. They do okay on this dance-popper about romantic strife. They seem to pop up sporadically in British pop culture since. That's cool.
And 29 years ago, Brits were mad for...
1 - "I Knew You Were Waiting (For Me)," George Michael and Aretha Franklin
Pepsi and Shirlie's former boss teamed up with the Queen of Soul and did the transatlantic charttopping double. I've covered this before, obviously. Song's not much, but George holds his own with a legend. He's a legit talent.
And now, my announcement. Perhaps years too late, Bobby Glovehead is now on Twitter. It just happened. What will I do with it? I imagine I'll flash back to charts I've previously covered, preview future posts, link to songs that catch my interest, maybe give some "bonus material," share my thoughts on anything and everything pop music, and who knows what else. Or maybe I'll do it for a week and give up. But you won't find out unless you follow me. Follow me, minions! If you are interested, look me up at https://twitter.com/MrBGlovehead #Irememberwhenthiswascalledapoundsign #getoffmylawn
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