Continuation.
20 - "Turn to Stone," Electric Light Orchestra
19 - "Serpentine Fire," Earth Wind and Fire
18 - "Just the Way You Are," Billy Joel
17 - "Short People," Randy Newman
16 - "Don't it Make My Brown Eyes Blue," Crystal Gayle
The second half begins with a single from ELO's biggest album, Out of the Blue. Not in my top 5 of their hits, but fine. And Jeff Lynne was not my favorite Traveling Wilbury.
Then it's Earth Wind and Fire with a song I don't really remember, but it was fast and fun. The lyrics appear to be about how a woman gives him the energy to fight life's battles. Cool.
Billy Joel would have his first Top Ten with a song he wrote for his first wife. Later, after they divorced, he would sometimes sing bitter alternate lyrics like, "She took the dog, the house, the car." Oh Billy, you're such a scamp.
Randy Newman, future composer of the song that is played when the Los Angeles Lakers win and the music for several Pixar movies, had his only Top 40 hit with this musical evisceration of the vertically challenged. Newman said that the song was a statement against prejudice, and given his songwriting style, I'm sure it was. But that didn't stop one critic from comparing him to Hitler. Anyway, "Short People," is the winner going away of this week's Uneasy Rider Award.
Last in this group is country's female Samson, Crystal Gayle. We covered this one last time we were in late '77. I still think it was a shame Patsy Cline wasn't around to sing this.
15 - "It's So Easy," Linda Ronstadt
14 - "Runaround Sue," Leif Garrett
13 - "We are the Champions," Queen
12 - "You Can't Turn Me Off (In the Middle of Turning Me On)," High Inergy
11 - "Come Sail Away," Styx
This group begins with the second and most successful of Linda's Buddy Holly covers. Looking back af all these songs Linda remade, it's amazing to think that back in the day, I had no idea that most of them had been done before. And of them all, this is one that I might actually like better than the original.
Next is teen idol Leif Garrett with a pointless cover of Dion's immortal ode to a female of too-easy virtue. The near future would see Garrett score his biggest hit with "I Was Made for Dancing," and then an impaired-driving accident that would cripple his best friend and later inspire a reunion on Behind the Music. Oh, and I don't care what anyone says, I refuse to pronounce his name "Lafe." I've always called him "Leaf," and I always will.
Then it's Queen with the bombastic ballad that's soundtracked many a sporting victory celebration in the three decades since it's release. It holds up as a great song in spite of becoming a cliche. I'm glad, however, that I've been fortunate enough not to hear the Crazy Frog cover version.
High Inergy were a late-period Motown girl group who had their only real hit with this sexy ballad about a woman who really doesn't want her coitus to be interruptussed. Unlike a lot of the songs I hear virtually sound unheard while doing this thing, I really enjoyed this one.
Lastly are Chicago's Bob Seger with the song about a guy who thinks he sees angels, but it turns out they were just aliens. I can't imagine how disappointed he must have been.
The ten at the top:
10 - "Hey Deanie," Shaun Cassidy
The third and final Top 10 for Keith Partridge's half-brother, and the second written by Eric Carmen. I like "That's Rock n' Roll" better, but that's not saying much.
9 - "You're in My Heart (The Final Acclaim)," Rod Stewart
Rod shows his softer side with this tender ballad about a lady he loves so much that not even a big-titted Dutch girl could sway him. He also compares his lover to the soccer teams Glasgow Celtic and Manchester United. I'm not sure that if I were a woman, I'd necessarily take that as a compliment. Maybe I'd think he was accusing me of being a slut, because, you know, soccer teams have eleven men in them.
8 - "Sentimental Lady," Bob Welch
This song by a guy who was in Fleetwood Mac in the years between their blues origins and their pop megastardom bored me then, and it bored me all over again. Speaking of Fleetwood Mac, I'm watching the World Junior Hockey Championship semifinal between the U.S. and Canada right now, and I swear that earlier in the game, the Buffalo arena organist played the 1984 Lindsey Buckingham solo single "Go Insane." Now that's a good song.
7 - "Slip-Slidin' Away," Paul Simon
The Garfunkelless One returns with another song about people looking back on their lives with regret and bemusement. It was his thing, and he did it well.
6 - "You Light Up My Life," Debby Boone
This song was two weeks removed from its record ten-week run at the top. You know, the more I hear it, the more I believe that Patti Smith was completely sincere when she expressed her love for it on the children's talk show Kids Are People, Too! It's legitimately a really good song. I'm as surprised as you are.
5 - "Here You Come Again," Dolly Parton
The woman with the talent as big as her...hair, with her breakout pop hit about not being able to resist someone who's wrong for you. For some reason, I think I'd like to go to Dollywood someday. Maybe just because it's there, like Everest.
4 - "(Every Time I Turn Around) Back in Love Again," L.T.D.
Like I said last time, just solid dance floor funk. And the singer does have a tinge of Tom Jones to his voice. In a good way.
3 - "Blue Bayou," Linda Ronstadt
Linda again, covering Roy Orbison. Apparently, because of this, "doing a Linda Ronstadt" became slang among NASCAR drivers for an impressive pass on the racetrack. As in: "He blew by you." Clever.
2 - "Baby Come Back," Player
This song hit #1, and got the band an opening slot for Eric Clapton. But only two lesser Top 40 hits would follow. But at least they still have this one, which was playing while Homer Simpson was on hold while trying to report his daughter Maggie missing.
It's time for Number One! This is it, here it comes, Number One!
1 - "How Deep is Your Love," The Bee Gees
It had to wait for America's love affair with Debby Boone to cool, but this lead single from Saturday Night Fever would finally have its time at the top. It's far down on my lists of both disco-era Bee Gees and Gibb bros. ballads, but still, very listenable.
One NotCasey extra this week (Heatwave's "Always and Forever") and two from the man himself (War's "Why Can't We be Friends" and "Midnight Train to Georgia" by Gladys Knight and the Pips).
More next week, Glovehead-heads.
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