Gloves Across the Water: U.K. Top 40 June 21, 1986 Part Two

20 - "On My Own," Patti LaBelle and Michael McDonald
A U.S. #1, and #2 here.  Meh.  But I will tell you that McDonald, while touring in Britain later this year, started a search for a singer he could sing this with in LaBelle's absence, and that if you keep reading, you will find out who he eventually chose.

19 - "Nasty," Janet Jackson
Wow, this is the highest this song got here.  That's just...well, let's just say if I were Janet, I'd make the U.K call her "Miss Jackson."

18 - "Bad Boy," Miami Sound Machine
Top Twenty here, Top Ten at home.  I think both results flatter this.

17 - "Invisible Touch," Genesis
All five singles from this album were Top Fives in America, but none charted higher than #14 here.  Surprising.  At least one should have cracked the Top Ten as far as I'm concerned, and I'd probably go with "Land of Confusion."

16 - "Set Me Free," Jaki Graham
The singer Mikey Mac picked for his British tour was this Birmingham-born child of Nigerian immigrants, who would pick up six Top 40s in '85 and '86.  Her biggest non-duet hit was this dance-popper about feeling trapped by love.  She's got a good voice.  Not much more to say than that.

15 - "Opportunities (Let's Make Lots of Money)," The Pet Shop Boys
#11 here, #10 in America, #1 in my heart.  Just brilliant.  Machiavellian marvelousness.

14 - "My Favorite Waste of Time," Owen Paul
The only hit by this Scotsman was this slick cover of a song that first appeared as the B-side of the wonderful Marshall Crenshaw single "Someday, Someway."  The goodness of the song shines through, but it's so much more obvious when you hear the original.

13 - "Amityville (The House on the Hill)," Lovebug Starski
Bronx rapper Kevin Smith's biggest success came here with this song about a haunted house, based very loosely on the one from the 1979 film The Amityville Horror.  I'm pretty sure that movie doesn't feature appearances by Dracula, the Bride of Frankenstein, and Captain Kirk from Star Trek.  A fun novelty party jam, and a must-add for your next Halloween mix.

12 - "Happy Hour," The Housemartins
From Hull, this band was fronted by singer Paul Heaton, whose lyrics often reflected his personal belief system, a mix of Christianity and Marxism.  Their first major hit was this jangly, spirited pop-rock number that seems to be about the futility of trying to fit in with the false happinesses of the upper classes.  I think I've got it.  They would pick up five more Top 40 hits over the next two years (including the #1 "Caravan of Love"), before breaking up, after which Heaton and guitarist Dave Hemingway formed an even more successful band, The Beautiful South.  Bassist Norman Cook would turn to dance music and achieve even bigger success as Fatboy Slim.

11 - "New Beginning," Bucks Fizz
The last Top Ten for these guys was this very-80s dance-popper about making the world better, with some lyrics in Swahili and Spanish for a worldly touch.  It's all right, in a turn-off-your-brain, Bananarama sort of way.

10 - "Vienna Calling," Falco
The second biggest international hit by Mr. Hans Holzel.  Not quite "Rock Me Amadeus," but I certainly answered the call.

9 - "Too Good to be Forgotten," Amazulu
The biggest of five Top 40s for this London ska-pop group was this sunny reminiscence of young love.  Solid beach music, like the only thing I'd heard from them previously, their cover of Bobby Bloom's "Montego Bay."

8 - "Sledgehammer," Peter Gabriel
An American #1, but only #4 here.  America wins.  This is pure gold, with and without the video.

7 - "Can't Get By Without You (The Decade Remix II)," The Real Thing
An update of a song we encountered in 1976.  Still pleasant disco-soul.

6 - "Addicted to Love," Robert Palmer
Another American #1 held to just Top Five status at home.  I'm not as outraged by this one though.

5 - "Hunting High and Low," a-Ha
While in America, the hits by these Norwegians ran out after "The Sun Always Shines on TV," they continued on a roll here, earning the fourth of nine Top Tens with this ballad about not giving up on a reunion with a lover.  Pretty good.  Worthy of at least  reaching the 30s in the States.  But of course, nothing could ever come close to the majesty of "Take on Me."

4 - "Holding Back the Years," Simply Red
And yet another case of a British act topping the U.S. charts but falling short at home.  This is the worst injustice of the three, even though it did hit #2.  This is just a stone classic, one of the great pop ballads of the decade, and by a long shot the best thing Mick Hucknall and company ever did.  For shame, U.K.

3 - "I Can't Wait," Nu Shooz
Somewhat annoying transatlantic Top Five.  I can wait, quite a long time in fact, before needing to hear this again.

2 - "The Edge of Heaven," Wham!
The next-to last charttopper for George and Andrew before they parted ways.  The usual boppy, poppy okayness.  They got out before they were asked to leave, which is always a good result.

And thirty years ago, the nation's favourite was...

1 - "Spirit in the Sky," Doctor and the Medics
Formed in London by Clive "The Doctor" Jackson, this band rode outrageous attire (notably the Doctor himself's ensemble of jesteresque clothes, kabuki makeup, and a towering triangular hairdo topped with a curlicue) and familiar material (a fairly straight cover of the otherworldly-minded Norman Greenbaum rock song that had topped the British charts sixteen years earlier) to a very brief run of popularity.  They had one more Top 40 and then returned to obscurity.  This didn't chart very high in the States, but was a #1 in Canada, which is how it came to be the first version of the song that reached my ears.  Thought it was great, but upon eventually hearing the superior original, it became clear that the greatness had nothing whatsoever to do with these guys in funny outfits.

Thank you for your patience.  Hopefully our separation will be shorter this time.  Bye for now.