More from the year the Flyers last won the Cup:
20 - "Calypso," John Denver
19 - "I Only Have Eyes for You," Art Garfunkel
18 - "18 with a Bullet," Pete Wingfield
17 - "Saturday Night," The Bay City Rollers
16 - "Heat Wave," Linda Ronstadt
We begin with the flip side of John Denver's hit from the last '75 list, "I'm Sorry." This is a tribute to the ship from which oceanographer Jacques Cousteau based his undersea research. For you kids out there, his underwater TV documentaries were very popular at the time. I remember my parents took me and my brother out by either Lake Erie or Ontario to catch a glympse of the Calypso when I was a kid. I don't think I was very impressed. Anyway, I enjoyed John's yodelling here.
Art Garfunkel had his first solo hit with this cover of a song even older than "Blue Eyes Crying in the Rain." "I Only Have Eyes for You" dates back to a 1934 movie called Dames, but it's most famous version was by the Flamingos in 1959. Art did nothing to change that here, but he did okay, I guess.
Because of radio reception problems, I didn't hear "Eighteen with a Bullet" very well. What I did hear was high-voiced soul rock that seemed all right. Looking up the lyrics, Wingfield uses record-industry metaphors to describe his plans for his relationship with a woman: He's a "single" looking for an "A-side" with whom he can start "raising a whole LP." Romantic. For those of you who don't know, chart magazines like Billboard place marks known as "bullets" on the position numbers of the songs that are seeing the greatest airplay and/or sales increases that week. Incidentally, on this particular chart, "Eighteen with a Bullet" was at Number 18...with a bullet.
I've trashed the Bay City Rollers both times they've come up here, but now it's time to praise them. All together now: "S-A-T-U-R-D-A-Y...Night!" This song just refuses to let you do anything but love it. If only they'd stopped then...
Last in this group we have Linda Ronstadt covering Martha and the Vandellas. She does pretty well, but her version is completely unnecessary. The vast majority of the songs that made her a superstar were covers. You couldn't get away with that today...unless you were a member of the cast of Glee.
15 - "My Little Town," Simon and Garfunkel
14 - "Miracles," Jefferson Starship
13 - "(They Just Can't Stop It The) Games People Play," The Spinners
12 - "Lyin' Eyes," The Eagles
11 - "Nights on Broadway," The Bee Gees
Hey, Garfunkel's back, and this time, he's got Simon! This was a one-off reunion that appeared on both men's then-current albums. For the most part, songs where the singer reminisces about the little burg they grew up in either portray those places as idyllic or toxic. If you're looking for the former, go find John Mellencamp's "Small Town," because this one is definitely the other kind. The place described here contains "nothing but the dead and dying." Harsh.
Uh oh, there's that Jefferson Starship pusbag from our last trip back to this year. Eww, I'm starting to break out in a rash just thinking about it. Better find an antidote...
And there it is. Oh, "Games People Play," I'm thrilled to see you again. You're so good to me and my ears. *stares disdainfully at "Miracles" from a safe distance*
Next are the Eagles with their very country song about a young girl who marries a rich old man then makes frequent visits to "the cheatin' side of town." Money doesn't buy happiness, apparently. So the Eagles have done all those reunion tours just for the love of performing with each other, right?
Finally, we have my favorite Bee Gees song, bar none. Don't ask me why, but I latched onto this song at four years old and have loved it ever since. It's funky, Barry's falsetto backup singing on the choruses is tight, and the way the bridge sounds like a completely different, unfinished song yet somehow blends seemlessly with the rest of it...magnifique! You can begin assailing my taste any time now.
Now we're talkin' Top Ten:
10 - "Let's Do it Again," The Staple Singers
The Staples' always considered themselves a gospel group that happened to do pop songs on the side, but I'm sure they got a few sideways looks at church after releasing this unabashed ode to "the flesh." Why a song so sexy was written as the theme for a Bill Cosby-Sidney Poitier comedy about fixing a boxing match, I'll never understand.
9 - "Sky High," Jigsaw
This bit of string-heavy rock was also written for a movie, an action film called The Man from Hong Kong co-starring one-Bond wonder George Lazenby. It was also used as ring-entrance music by Mexican wrestling superstar Mil Mascaras. I remember thinking it was okay back in the day.
8 - "Low Rider," War
This wasn't written for a movie, but it's been used in several, from Cheech and Chong flicks to Beverly Hills Chihuahua. You're all probably humming it in your head now, so I'll stop and give you a moment...
Okay, that's enough.
7 - "Feelings," Morris Albert
This time, I tried listening to this song without the baggage of its infamy. And...it's just as ham-fisted and cheesy as its reputation. Sorry Morris, you deserved what you got.
6 - "This Will Be," Natalie Cole
I know this jazzy debut single by Nat King Cole's daughter less from its time as a hit than from it's use in commercials for products like jewellery and online dating services. She would go on to do one thing I really enjoyed (having her brain taken over by cabbage in the "Zontar" episode of SCTV) and one thing I really hated (duetting with her dead father on "Unforgettable." I'm sorry, but that was just creepy).
5 - "The Way I Want to Touch You," The Captain and Tenille
Daryl and Toni aren't nearly as awesome a MOR duo as The Carpenters, but I must admit, when they weren't singing about the mating habits of rodents, they weren't that bad. This song is pretty damn sexy, truth be told.
4 - "Island Girl," Elton John
Elton sings about a (fictional) Jamaican prostitute, who some have speculated might not be a girl at all, since she's apparently 6 foot 3, and the boy who wants to get her out of the life. Basically, a more interesting version of "Roxanne." But of course I didn't know that at four. It was just that crazy Elton John on the radio again with another song that was fun to sing along with.
3 - "Who Loves You," The Four Seasons
Frankie Valli shows up again, this time with the rest of the group he had so many 60s hits with. I guess it's all right. I have to say I hate "Oh What a Night (December 1963)" waaaaay more.
2 - "Fly, Robin, Fly," Silver Convention
This German group introduced North America to "eurodisco," and in doing so, hit Number 1. It's a pretty catchy tune, nicely orchestrated, and the lyrics, while sparse, do their job. I don't think this was the U.S. single cover, but if it had been, it might have been on top for longer than three weeks: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Silver_Convention.jpg
And if you've recently turned 35 and are looking up what was Number 1 the day you were born, you will find that it was...
1 - "That's the Way (I Like It)," KC and the Sunshine Band
Them again, with the one big hit of theirs I haven't covered yet. Of their Big Three, I have it ranked right in the middle, below "Get Down Tonight" and above "Shake Your Booty." Uh huh, uh huh.
The two NotCasey extras were Hot Chocolate's "You Sexy Thing" and Nazareth's "Love Hurts." Casey also played Otis Redding's "(Sittin' On) The Dock of the Bay," because it was a rare instance of an artist scoring his first #1 after his death.
Another one bites the dust. Next week we're due for something earlier in the decade, but that's okay. I'm ready to go back a bit.
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