GATW: UKT40 April 7, 1979

Completion,

20 - "Just What I Needed," The Cars

The Boston New Wavers' first single scored across the pond as well as at home.  You might say that proved they were the real deal. Or you might not.  But I just did, so there.

19 - "Into the Valley," Skids

From Dunfermline, Scotland, this band scored their firstand biggest of their four hits with this punkish tune about the futility of young men being inducted into the army.  I think that's it.  Guitarist Stuart Adamson would go on to even more success with his next band, Big Country.

18 - "He's the Greatest Dancer," Sister Sledge

This was a bigger hit here than "We Are Family."  Not by much, but still, that feels wrong somehow.

17 - "Waiting for an Alibi," Thin Lizzy 

Their third of four Top Tens was this gritty rocker about a doomed bookie/gambler named Valentino.  I don't think these guys get their due as the British version of Springsteen.  They hit that same sweet spot.

16 - "Strange Town," The Jam 

More punky pop goodness from these guys on this tune about trying to find kindred spirits in a place you've never been before.  This is the kind of song that makes me wish I'd grown up in Britain to have this stuff on the radio in the background.

15 - "Keep On Dancin'," Gary's Gang

The only major hit by this New York group was this bland track that makes KC and the Sunshine Band seem like poets and innovators.  May be second only to "Makin' It" on my list of the worst of disco.

14 - "Money in My Pocket," Dennis Brown

This Jamaican became a star at home as a teenager, to the degree that Bob Marley himself declared him to be his favorite singer.  His only major international hit was his signature song, this reminder that material wealth is no substitute for love.  Solid head-nodding material.

13 - "Don't Stop Me Now," Queen

While this energetic confidence-rocker was a flop in America, at home it was a Top Ten hit and is one of their most enduring songs.  It's fantastic pump-up music that will make a supersonic man or woman out of you.

12 - "Can You Feel the Force," The Real Thing 

The Liverpool funksters' last non-remixed Top Five was this optimistic number that just might have been influenced by one of George Lucas' movies.  I don't remember which one, and I'm sure it has no widespread cultural impact today at all.

11 - "Some Girls," Racey

The Somerset boys' biggest hit was this glammy pop song about the varying degrees of romantic behavior practiced by the female of the species.  Catchy, but I wonder if these guys had ever been to the States and heard a jingle for Peter Paul candy bars.  Don't know why that popped into my head.  I feel like a nut.

The Top Ten shot first.

10 - "Oliver's Army," Elvis Costello 

EC's highest-charting single was this song that has a similar theme to the Skids song, but of course much sharper and barbed,  And apparently, the n-word he uses in relation to the British military presence in Northern Ireland was never censored on U.K. radio.  I feel that was a sebsible decision.  It's used in a very impactful context, and any disguise attempt would blunt it and miss the point.

9 - "Turn the Music Up," Players Association 

Another New York disco group with one real hit.  Generic, but better than Gary's Gang.

8 - "Sultans of Swing," Dire Straits 

The debut of Knopfler and Co.  Still slickly catchy as ever.

7 - "Lucky Number," Lene Lovich 

Detroit-born Lili-Marlene Premilovich moved with her family to England when she was 13, then floated around the London scene until she scored her first and biggest hit with this jittery ode to having love break up one's seemingly ideal single existence.  Lovich's voice has an odd quality that sounds to me like a cross between Siouxsie Sioux and Cyndi Lauper.   And this week, that's enough for an Uneasy Rider.

6 - "Cool for Cats," Squeeze 

The London New Wavers picked up the first of two #2s with this jaunty tune with lyrics about cowboys and Indians, police capturing thieves, and picking up women in bars.  And the title apparently comes from the early British equivalent of American Bandstand.  It doesn't make sense, but it doesn't have to.  It's just cool for cats.

5 - "Something Else," The Sex Pistols 

Them again, this time with a Sid-sung cover of an Eddie Cochran rockabilly tune.  A fun little bit to connect the dots between early rock and punk.  It can be hard to believe that Elvis and his ilk were once this great menace to society.

4 - "I Want Your Love," Chic 

Surprisingly, this charted higher here than either of their two American #1s, "Le Freak" and "Good Times."  Can't say that's right, but this is good enough for it not to be any kind of outrage.

3 - "Bright Eyes," Art Garfunkel

It is perceived by most that Paul Simon had the bigger solo career, but Artie did beat him in one metric; i.e., he had two British Number Ones to Paul's zero.  His second charttopper was this ballad from the film version of the novel Watership Down.  I've never been exposed to any form of the story, but maybe one day I'll be in the mood for rabbit mythology.   As for the song, it's basically Garfunkel in his natural MOR habitat, but with added dark talk about a "river of death."  I don't get it, but Britain did to the degree that it was the year's best-selling single.  Huh.

2 - "In the Navy," The Village People 

The camp crew's classic disco recruiting effort.  Hey, why were you chuckling when they said "They're signing up new seamen fast."  That’s not funny.  But I will admit that there's a humorous quality to the interjection "Oceanography what?!"

And on top over there 37 years ago was...

1 - "I Will Survive," Gloria Gaynor 
We all know it.  It's been referenced to death.  But it's still powerful.  That's right, I do have all my life to live and all my love to give, dammit!

There's another one.  The cycle will repeat in time.  Remain calm in the meantime.

GATW: UKT40 April 7, 1979

April 1979.  The Kingdom was in the midst of the election campaign that would bring Margaret Thatcher to power.  Though I don't feel that many of the makers of the music on the following chart voted Conservative.  Just a hunch.

40 - "Valley of the Dolls," Generation X
The punk band that launched Billy Idol had their third and final hit with this catchy rock tune about sex and violence.  Simple and good.  But not at all related to the 1966 novel by Jacqueline Susann, nor to the film version which starred Patty Duke and Manson-murders victim Sharon Tate.

39 - "Everybody’s Happy Nowadays," Buzzcocks
More punk, this time from a Bolton band who were a little more on the melodic side than most of their peers.  The fifth of their six hits was this sharp blast of angst about being envious of others' joy.  They may have been the best of their time at striking the balance between accessibility and credibility.

38 - "Let's Fly Away," Voyage
A French disco group with a British singer.  Fluffy dance music about going on holiday.  Okay, but far from enduring.

37 - "The Logical Song," Supertramp 
Their biggest hit on both sides of the Atlantic.  Roger Hodgson declared that he didn’t need no education before Roger Waters did.  But he didn't have a children's choir backing him up.

36 - "Imperial Wizard," David Essex 
Mr. "Rock On"'s last 70s hit was this martial-sounding call to arms against tyranny.  An interesting, if not quite effective, to combine punk anger with glam gloss.

35 - "Remember Then," Showaddywaddy 
Another retro number from these guys, this time a cover of a 1962 Earls hit about recalling a lost love.  Not very mem-mem-rememem-meh-memorable.

34 - "BYOF," Fantastic Four
This Detroit group had a number of R&B hits in the 60s, but their only British hit was this groovefest whose title stands for "Bring Your Own Funk."  Not sure why they thought that was necessary, since this seems to contain more than enough to go around.

33 - "Questions and Answers," Sham 69
From Horsham in Surrey, this punk band picked up five late 70s hits, the fourth being this poppy tune about being true to yourself and not just accepting what you are told.  Basic, but effective.

32 - "I Don't Want to Lose You," Kandidate
This British soul group's biggest hit was this meh ballad from the soundtrack of a movie called Sunburn, which not only starred Farrah Fawcett, but also three British actors who would go on in the 80s to star in three separate dramas on three separate U.S. networks: Joan Collins of ABC's Dynasty, John Hillerman of CBS's Magnum, P.I., and William Daniels of NBC's St. Elsewhere.  That's way more interesting than this song.

31 - "Tragedy," The Bee Gees
Their fourth U.K. #1.  Just sublime disco drama.

30 - "English Civil War," The Clash
The sixth hit for The Only Band That Matters was this adaptation of the American Civil War song "When Johnny Comes Marching Home" describing a potential conflict spawned by a rising tide of far-right racism.  It's true, everything old is new again.

29 - "You Bet Your Love," Herbie Hancock
This Chicago jazz keyboardist played with Miles Davis in the 60s, then embarked on a solo career that touched on pop, funk, and here, disco.  Pretty standard stuff, remarkable mainly for Hancock's vocoder-assisted vocals and some nice keyboard work.  But not as attention-grabbing as, say, "Rockit."

28 - "The Staircase (Mystery)," Siouxsie and the Banshees 
The second hit for Ms. Sioux and crew was this gothy rocker that uses architectural features as a metaphor for confusion.  I think that's it.  Great stuff.

27 - "Wow," Kate Bush 
Her third Top 40 was this drama ballad about aspiring artists being given the runaround by the people who make up the business half of "show business."  And yes, I would say the song lives up to the title.

26 - "Forever in Blue Jeans," Neil Diamond 
The D-Man with his simple pop tune about being happy with modest means.  I don't know about forever, but I'm in blue jeans right now, and I feel pretty good.

25 - "Clog Dance," Violinski 
Led by ELO violinist Mik Kaminsky, this band had their only hit with this rock instrumental.  Sounds like stock production music to accompany sports highlights.  Meh.

24 - "Silly Thing," The Sex Pistols
This creation of impresario Malcolm McLaren became the snotty face of punk when they debuted in 1976.  By this time, singer Johnny Rotten had left, and bassist Sid Vicious had just committed suicide while awaiting trial for the murder of girlfriend Nancy Spungen.  The group was still attempting to carry on, releasing an album, The Great Rock n’roll Swindle, which featured some tracks with Rotten and Vicious, as well as other contributors such as infamouse train robber Ronnie Biggs.  This song, however, is mainly a showcase for guitarist Steve Jones and drummer Paul Cook, the latter of whom sings lead.  It's loud, fast, and angry, but without the bilious vocal sneers of Rotten, it just blends in with the rest of the punk pack.  But we'll hear more from this LP later.

23 - "Shake Your Body (Down to the Ground)," The Jacksons 
Michael and bros., dancing, shouting, and funking stuff up.  Just joy.

22 - "Hold the Line," Toto
Top 5 at home, #14 here.  The Brits had it right.

21 - "The Runner," The Three Degrees
These Philly ladies hit #2 at home and #1 here with the classic "When Will I See You Again," but while they struck out on the American charts afterwards, they'd make the British Top 40 seven more times with songs like this disco workout about a commitmentphobic lover.  On this, they sound like ABBA, but with soul.  And I mean that as the highest of compliments.

In Part Two: fortune, felines, and armed forces.

GATW - UKT40 March 19, 1994 Part One

And now, 1994.  On the date of this chart, Europe's first invert roller coaster, Nemesis, opened at the Alton Towers theme park in Staffordshire.  Let's see if the charts at the time provided similar thrills.

40 - "Stay Together," Suede
These Londoners are credited with helping launch Britpop with their 1993 debut album.  Before releasing their follow-up, they put out this standalone single, which became their first Top Five hit.  It's a Bowiesque ballad about love among the ruins of a crumbling civilization.  I like what it's trying to do, but I find Brett Anderson's voice grating on this.  And the title proved ironic, because guitarist Bernard Butler would leave the group shortly after this was recorded.

39 - "Switch," Sender
The biggest hit for these London rap-rockers was this example of the politically minded hip-hop that was falling out of fashion at the time.  Pretty convincing, and well worth a listen.

38 - "I Never Want an Easy Life if Me and He Were to Get There," The Charlatans 
Their seventh hit was this loping rock tune about preferring a life of drug-addledness.  I think that's it.  It's all right, but not quite as memorable as the title promises.

37 - "Murder She Wrote," Chaka Demus and Pliers 
The fourth hit for the Jamaican duo is this dancehall track about a manipulative woman named Maxine.  She seems shady, but funnily enough, nowhere is it suggested that she has killed anyone.  And there's no mention of the TV show the song takes its title from.  Which is disappointing, because I feel like "Angela Lansbury" is a name that would sound cool with a Jamaican accent.

36 - "Love Come Down," Alison Limerick
After some notable backup singing work in the 80s, Londoner Limerick had a handful of 90s dance hits, including this cover of Evelyn King's 1982.  Nice singing, but otherwise inessential.

35 - "Come in Out of the Rain," Wendy Moten 
The biggest of two U.K. hits for this Memphis lady was this passionately performed reconciliation ballad.  Meh material uplifted by Moten's church-nurtured voice.

34 - "Groove Thang," Zhane 
The second of three Brit hits for this Philly duo was this slinky dance tune about slinky dancing.  One of the better examples of R&B of the period.

33 - "Again," Juliet Roberts
One of the several hits by this Grenada-born singer was this sophisticated soul-dance track about a brief love affair.  Roberts has a smooth, jazzy voice that makes this more than just a playlist filler.

32 - "The Power of Love," Celine Dion
The first U.K. Top Five for the Quebecoise cha teaser was this cover of a 1985 #1 by American Jennifer Rush.  Big singer, big ballad.  If that's what you're looking for, this is your jam,

31 - "The More You Ignore Me, The Closer I Get," Morrissey 
One of Stephen Patrick's whopping 33 Top 40s here, and the closest he came tout having one in America.  Definitely one of his most accessible pop tunes, but the premise of him being threateningly inescapable is definitely in keeping with his overall theme.  Very good.

30 - "Let's Face the Music and Dance," Nat King Cole 
Haven't been able to find out why his 1961 recording of a song originally written for the 1936 Fred Astaire/Ginger Rogers film Follow the Fleet was on the charts at this time.  I'm guessing it was in a commercial.  Doesn’t matter though, it's the King swinging a standard, and there's never a bad reason to give that some love.

29 - "Because of Love," Janet Jackson 
Miss Jackson with an uptempo Jam/Lewis love song.  Nothing more or less than what you'd expect from that description.  And that's not a bad thing.

28 - "All for Love," Bryan Adams, Rod Stewart and Sting
Three rock stars sap out for this dreckfest from a Three Musketeers movie featuring future TV stars Kiefer Sutherland, Chris O'Donnell, and Charlie Sheen.  Awful.  Adams had already planted himself in this world, but the other two still had enough respectability that they didn’t need to piss away.  Best I can say is that it only hit #2 here.

27 - "Whispering Your Name," Alison Moyet 
The Essex singer's most recent hit was this acoustic ballad about suspected infidelity.  I love that voice.  She should have been a bigger worldwide star.

26 - "I Can See Clearly Now," Jimmy Cliff 
The reggae pioneer covered Johnny Nash's 1972 optimism ode for the soundtrack of Cool Runnings, the fictionalized account of the Jamaican bobsled team's appearance at the 1988 Winter Olympics in Calgary.  Okay movie, okay cover.

25 - "Move On Baby," Cappella 
The first of three Top Tens for this Italian dance outfit.  Okay beats, good soul singing, unspectacular rap.  The usual.

24 - "Glam Rock Cops," Carter the Unstoppable Sex Machine
The ninth of twelve hits by the London duo of Jim "Jim Bob" Morrison and Les "Fruitbat" Carter was this rocker about being young and bored and disenchanted.  It's much better faux-Bowie than the Suede track.

23 - "Good as Gold (Stupid as Mud)," The Beautiful South
After the breakup of The Housemartins, Paul Heaton and Dave Hemingway formed a new group that was even more successful, scoring 22 Top 40s between 1989 and 2005.  The eighth of these was this bouncy pop song about longing for something better even though one knows one's limitations.  I think that's it.  This might not be one of their best, but it's still damn good.  These guys hit the same sweet spot for me that Crowded House does.

22 - "Loser," Beck
L.A.-born Beck Hansen grew up wanting to be a folk/blues singer, but after moving to New York he absorbed hip-hop and surrealist influences which created a unique sound typified by his breakthrough hit, a combination of slide guitar samples and Beck's nonsensical Rap about "butane in my veins" and "beefcake pantyhose."  It all combines into something wonderful.  Two fun facts:  1) The first line of the chorus is "Soy una perdador;" Spanish for "I'm a loser."  Many people heard many different things.  I myself first thought he said "sodium pentathol" aka truth serum.  Like he was reluctantly admitting his loserdom, you know?  2) The voice that says "I'm a driver, I'm a winner" is not, contrary to popular belief, that of George H.W. Bush.

21 - "Don't Go Breakin' My Heart," Elton John and RuPaul
Sir Elton's 1993 Duets album produced this new version of his smash 1976 Kiki Dee collaboration, this time performed with drag performer RuPaul Charles, who had recently broken through as a recording artist with the dance hit "Supermodel (You Better Work)."  The house beats and Ru's attitude make it something different than the original, so it works.

In Part Two: violence, innocence, and...the Charleston?

GATW: UKT40 March 19, 1994 Part Two

Here's the other part.

20 - "Things Can Only Get Better," D:Ream
The second and most successful of three chart runs for this single by a Northern Irish pop band.  Decent dance track about learning optimism.  Three years later, the Labour Party's would use it as a theme song that brought them back to power after 18 years.  Did things get better?  Well, I have never lived in Britain, so I can't really say.

19 - "I'm Broken," Pantera
Metal once again shows up, this time from this Texas thrash band.  Phil Anselmo artfully shouts lyrics inspired by his struggles with crippling back pain, while the late great Dimebag Darrell shreds away.  An impressive 4.5 on the Headbangometer.

18 - "Linger," The Cranberries 
The Irish band's first U.K. hit was this jangly ballad inspired by Dolores O'Riordan's betrayal at the hands of her first boyfriend.  Pretty and affecting.  I don't think they did any better than this and "Dreams."

17 - "Rocks," Primal Scream
These Scots broke through in 1991 with their house-influenced Sceamadelica album, so it was a shock to fans when their follow-up LP was a collection of Stones-esque blues rocker like this track, a catchy stomper about getting one's kicks.  I like it a lot, but it's so much of a detour that the backlash was more than understandable.

16 - "The Way You Work It," E.Y.C.
This American boy band (whose initials stand for Express Yourself Clearly) had most of their success in Britain with songs like this innocuous dance jam.  It may be clear, but it's also bland.

15 - "Whatta Man," Salt-N-Pepa featuring En Vogue
The rap trio teams up with the vocal quartet for an ode to a man who is attractive, respectful, and proficient at both fatherhood and sex.  Salt-N-Pepa doing their Salt-N-Pepa thing, which was quite welcome at the time.

14 - "Let the Beat Control Your Body," 2 Unlimited 
More techno-rap from the Belgians.  There was indeed bass in my face, but my body remained under my jurisdiction throughout.

13 - "Violently Happy," Bjork
The otherworldly Icelander had her fifth hit with this dance track about feeling so ecstatic you don't know what to do with yourself.  The sound matches the sentiment.  The world needed Bjork before we even knew we did.

12 - "I Believe," Marcella Detroit
After splitting with her Shakespear's Sister partner Siobahn Fahey, theformer Marcy Levy put out a solo album that produced three hits, thefirst and biggest being this idealistic peace and harmony ballad. Sweet, but underwhelming.

11 - "Shine On," Degrees of Motion
More boilerplate house-dance.  Nothing more to add.

Breaking news: Disney has just announced that they are making a live-action remake of this week's Top Ten.

10 - "Breathe Again," Toni Braxton
The Maryland soul lady had her first U.K. Top Ten with this ballad on which she essentially admits that she will die if her lover leaves her.  Romantic..?

9 - "I Like to Move It," Reel 2 Real featuring The Mad Stuntman 
The most enduring cultural contribution by Colombian-American producer Erick Morillo was this combination of house and dancehall that features Mr. Stuntman toasting about attractive women.  Naturally, it would eventually become most closely associated with a series of animated movies about escaped zoo animals.

8 - "Return to Innocence," Enigma 
German producer Michael Cretu created Enigma as a way to combine electronic dance music with sounds not common to pop.  On his 1991 breakthrough "Sadeness Part 1," it was Gregorian chants, while on this one it was a recording of a traditional song of the Amis, an indigenous people of Taiwan.  He uses it to great effect, but unfortunately, he didn't credit the original performers.  Thankfully, that was eventually corrected.  That was a return to innocence in and of itself.

7 - "Pretty Good Year," Tori Amos 
Myra Ellen Amos grew up in North Carolina, then moved to Los Angeles in the 80s, where she got her first record deal with a synthpopband called Y Kant Tori Read.  They were dropped after one flop album, but Tori found success in the next decade as a purveyor of ethereal yet raw piano pop.  The second of her three Top Tens was this ballad with inscrutable lyrics about a relationship between two people named Greg and Lucy.  I have always been a big Tori fan, to the point where I went to one of her shows on the tour supporting the album this track came from, Under the Pink.  Undoubtedly my favorite of my relatively few concert experiences.  And this song in particular probably ranks somewhere between 6--10 on my all time Torilist.

6 - "Renaissance," M People
The fifth of ten Top Tens for the Manchester dance outfit is this house banger about coming home to a lover.  Not a da Vinci reference in sight, but still lifted to very-goodness by the powerhouse vocals of Heather Small.

5 - "Girls and Boys," Blur
The future Oasis archenemies had their first Top Five with this Eurodance- inspired tune about indiscriminate and uninhibited sex among youth in European vacation hotspots.  It captures that vibe perfectly, with Damon Albarn ironically stating that one's partner or partners in such behavior "always should be someone you really love."  I think I have it just ahead of "Country House" as their best.

4 - "Streets of Philadelphia," Bruce Springsteen
Bruce's biggest U.K. hit was this Oscar-winning contribution to the film Philadelphia, which starred Tom Hanks as a gay lawyer who sues his firm for wrongful dismissal after they fire him shortly after he is diagnosed with AIDS.  Though it resonated the the time, the movie hasn't aged well; however, the song's stark spareness remains a powerful portrait of the loneliness and hopelessness of someone facing the end of their life.  One of the Boss's crowning achievements.

3 - "The Sign," Ace of Base 
The biggest hit by Ulf Ekberg and the three Berggren siblings of Gothenburg, Sweden was this sunny bit of techno-reggae about changing one's life for the better. I still prefer "All That She Wants," but I like this better now than I did then.

2 - "Without You," Mariah Carey
Surprisingly, her only British charttopper to date is this cover of Harry Nilsson 1971 smash ballad.  She makes it bigger, but definitely not better.

And on top 23 years ago was...
1 - "Doop," Doop
This Dutch duo's only major impact on international pop culture was this mostly instrumental dance track that incorporates Roaring 20s jazz of the kind that would accompany the step known as "the Charleston."  Anachronistic fun, and this chart's clear Uneasy Rider.   Doop doop doop indeed.

Another one down.  Thanks as always, and see you next time.

GATW: UKT40 March 5, 1977 Part Two

We're closing.

20 - "Rockaria," Electric Light Orchestra 
The band's third Top Ten was this tale of a rock fan meeting an opera diva and turning her and her fellow classical musicians on to more modern sounds.  A fun little collision.

19 - "Isn't She Lovely," David Parton 
Famously, Stevie Wonder would not allow Motown to release this sweet tribute to his newborn daughter Aisha from Songs in the Key of Life as a single, so Newcastle singer Parton took it upon himself to do a soundalike cover.  Good karaoke, nothing more.

18 - "Knowing Me, Knowing You," ABBA
The Swedish pop machine scored their fifth U.K. #1 with this slick breakup song.  I love it.  There is nothing I can do.

17 - "Baby I Know," The Rubettes 
The ninth and last hit for these MOR poppers was this folky tune about knowing your lover is stepping out.  Pretty average radio pop of the time.

16 - "Sideshow," Barry Biggs 
The biggest of this Jamaican reggae star's four U.K. hits was this pretty straight cover of Blue Magic's 1974 hit about a circus of the lonely.  You can afford to pass this byear for the original.

15 - "Sound + Vision," David Bowie 
Another hit for Mr. Bowie, this time a bouncy yet dark funk-rocker about craving sensory stimulation in solitude.  This would be the first taste the public got of what would be his influential "Berlin trilogy," and these ears find it quite delectable.

14 - "They Shoot Horses, Don't They," Racing Cars
This Welsh band's only hit was this ballad clearly inspired by its namesake, a 1969 Jane Fonda movie about a Depression-era dance marathon.  The song's a bit of  downer, but from what I read of the film, it's a laugh riot by comparison.  And for some reason, the song reminds me of April Wine.

13 - "Don't Leave Me This Way," Thelma Houston 
This disco classic was a #1 in the States, but only got this high here.  But there might be an explanation for that coming up.

12 - "Torn Between Two Lovers," Mary MacGregor 
The Minnesotan's adultery admission was a #1 at home and a Top Five here.  It's not good, not bad, it just is.

11 - "This is Tomorrow," Bryan Ferry 
Ferry had been having solo hits from the beginning of Roxy Music's stardom, and his output increased during the band's 1976-79 hiatus.  This one's a stylish rock tune about looking forward to the future.  Greatness.

10 - "What Can I Say," Boz Scaggs 
From the breakthrough Silk Degrees LP, this is a smooth take-me-back disco track that somehow missed the Top 40 in the U.S.  That's a lowdown shame, one might say.

9 - "Jack in the Box," The Moments
The men behind "Love on a Two-Way Street" had three Top Tens in Britain, the last being this dance number in which a man assures his lover that his devotion is as much of a fact as that clown coming out of his container when his crank is turned, the Three Bears catching Goldilocks, and Little Boy Blue having a horn.  Interesting choices.  Still, very good song.

8 - "Sing Me," The Brothers 
The only hit for the fivery Bayou Brothers from the island nation of Mauritius was this reggae song about being someone's song, ship, and kite.  This was a time for slightly weird analogies, apparently.

7 - "Don't Leave Me This Way," Harold Melvin and the Blue Notes
The original version of this song was by these Philly stalwarts, and it was released as a single here in the wake of the Houston version.  Not only that, it outcharted it.  I wouldn't say it's better or worse, it's just it's own wonderful thing.

6 - "Don't Give Up on Us," David Soul 
Hutch sings.  It's a hit.  America is satiated, but Britain came back for more.

5 - "Don't Cry for Me Argentina," Julie Covington 
Londoner Covington was an established stage and TV actress when she was selected to sing the lead role on the Evita LP.  It's the project's most famous song, Eva Peron's justification for her actions and plea for the continued love of her public.  Covington does very well with it, but am I a heretic if I say I like Madonna's version better?

4 - "Romeo," Mr. Big 
Before the American hair farmers of "To be With You" in My,  there were these Brits and their pop-rock imagining of a tryst between Shakespeare's star-crossed lovers.  Apparently, lyrics like "step back inside me, take me to your bed" were considered too hot for the BBC, who briefly banned it.  That adds a bit of a kick to it's general, pleasantly catchy 70sness.

3 - "Chanson D'Amour," The Manhattan Transfer 
The only #1 for the New York jazz vocal quartet was this cover of a 1958 hit by Al and Dotty Todd.  Janis Siegel sounds more than a little like Edith Piaf on this, which captures the vibe perfectly.  And that feeling of another eradicated gives it this chart's Uneasy Rider.

2 - "Boogie Nights," Heatwave 
#2 on both sides of the pond, but still the best in town nevertheless.

And on top some 40 years ago was...
1 - "When I Need You," Leo Sayer 
Not much to say about this, except that I just learned that Leo had to settle a lawsuit from Leonard Cohen because of the strong similarities between this song's chorus and that of "Famous Blue Raincoat."  Never noticed that before, but yeah, it's definitely there.  I miss Leonard.  But maybe I can be with him if I just close my eyes.  I heard that somewhere.

Another entry, another chart.  There will be more soon.

GATW: UKT40 March 5, 1977 Part One

Spring 1977.  The Queen was in the middle of a two-month tour during which she would visit Polynesia, New Zealand, Australia, and Africa.  Back home, her subjects were enjoying the following music.

40 - "Moody Blue," Elvis Presley 
Months before his death, the King found the Top Ten with this country/disco hybrid about an emotionally unpredictable lady.  A decent late effort.

39 - "Wake Up Susan," The Spinners 
The Detroit soul stars try to rouse a lady friend for a late night booty call.  Of course, that's not what they called it then.  Ah, the evolution of language.  Anyway, not among their best.  Just mid-range disco.

38 - "Go Your Own Way," Fleetwood Mac 
This greatness only got this high here?  To quote one of our most prominent modern philosophers, "Sad!"

37 - "Oh Boy," Brotherhood of Man 
The not-quite-ABBA added to their hitpile with this tepid attempt to covey the emotion of a woman trying to track down her wayward man.  They’re more forgiving of him than I am for this.

36 - "Soul Cha Cha," Van McCoy 
In one of his post-"Hustle" efforts, McCoy tries to bring the cha-cha to the disco.  Not too bad.  I might actually get up for this.

35 - "One Drink Too Many," Sailor 
The thirdand last hit for this glam footnote was this tale of dates gone wrong due to overserving.  The singer adopts a bad Spanish accent at the end.  I regret listening to this twice.

34 - "Groovy Kind of Love," Les Gray
The only solo hit for this ex-Mud man was this cover of The Mindbenders 1966 hit.  There's a talk-box at the beginning, and a boring sax solo in the middle.  Phil Collins did it better, and I didn't like his version much at all

33 - "Crazy Water," Elton John 
Sir Elton's flirtation with disco produced this tune about how life separates us from the ones we love.  Or something like that.  A buried track that belongs there.

32 - "First Thing in the Morning," Kiki Dee
Elton's protégé picked up her last 70s hit with this midtempo rocker abouttempestuous romance. I appreciate her more with every new song I hear.

31 - "Mighty Power of Love," Tavares 
The New England soul brothers funk it up with this ode to nature’s most formidable force.  I think this is my favorite of theirs now.

30 - "Another Suitcase in Another Hall," Barbara Dickson 
Scottish Dickson was a fixture in British folk circles during the 60s and 70s, but it was her turn in a Beatles-themed stage musical that caught the attention of Tim Rice and Andrew Lloyd Webber, who tapped her to play the role of "Mistress" in their concept album about the life of Argentine political figure Eva Peron.  Dickson gives a solid performance as a woman deciding that she can and will move on from a life as a powerful man's kept woman.  We will hear more from this album later.

29 - "You're More Than a Number in My Little Red Book," The Drifters
Though none of the original members of this legendary soul vocal group remained, they were still managing hits in the U.K., including this old-school number about assuring a woman that she's more than just a conquest.  They didn’t need to go disco to connect with listeners, which is heartening.

28 - "Maybe I'm Amazed," Wings 
Live version of McCartney's best non-Beatle love song.  Nothing more to say.

27 - "More Than a Feeling," Boston 
Only U.K. hit for the Tom Scholz corporation.  They clearly figured out early that all there was to come would sound pretty much like this.

26 - "Car Wash," Rose Royce
Surprisingly, only their third biggest hit on these shores.  But still the funkiest song ever about automobile detailing.

25 - "You'll Never Know What You're Missing," The Real Thing 
Third hit for the Liverpool soul band.  Decent ballad.  For some reason, the lead singer sounds to me a lot like the guy from Dr. Hook on this.  Do I need my ears checked?

24 - "Darlin' Darlin' Baby," The O'Jays
Terrific Philly soul from these legends.  Mix it in with the Barry White the next time you play music with...intentions.

23 - "Suspicion," Elvis Presley 
This number about romantic doubt was recorded by Elvis in 1962, but was initially an album cut only.  Two years later, Texas Terry Stafford went to #3 with it, and thirteen years after that the original made the British Top Ten.  Just the man doing his thing, effortlessly.

22 - "Saturday Nite," Earth, Wind and Fire
The funk masters with a party jam about...taking life more seriously.  These guys make it work though, because they're, well, the masters.

21 - "Daddy Cool," Boney M
The German dance machine with their nonsensical disco breakthrough.  No one has done Eurodance silliness better, and no one ever will.

In Part Two: toys, senses, and taking the term "rock opera" literally.

GATW: UKT40 February 19, 1983

The business end.

20 - "The Story of the Blues," Wah!

Wah! was essentially Liverpudlian Pete Wylie, a New Wave scene fixture whose biggest hit was this bit o' synthpop about feeling bad.  Not nearly as interesting as the credited name.

19 - "Twisting by the Pool," Dire Straits 

Mark Knopfler's crew had their fifth home Top 40 with this aytipically exuberant rock song about getting away from it all at some warm holiday destination.  Just happiness and fun from an unlikely source.

18 - "The Cutter," Echo and the Bunnymen 

Their first of three Top Tens was this gothy number about...um, not wanting to be cut, I think.  Doesn't matter, it's these guys doing what they do best.

17 - "You Can't Hurry Love," Phil Collins 

His first of three Number Ones here was this Supremes cover.  Again, it's surprisingly good.

16 - "Never Gonna Give You Up," Musical Youth 

This Birmingham reggae boy band is known only for first hit "Pass the Dutchie," in the U.S., but back home they had five more Top 40s, including this loping pledge of teenage romantic devotion.  Definitely better than that Rick Astley song.  It rolls right over it.

15 - "Love on Your Side,"  Thompson Twins 

The second Top Ten for the unrelated trio was this burbly popper about trying to start a relationship with someone who isn't cooperating.  Or something like that.  My lyric interpretation software may need an upgrade.  Good song, regardless.

14 - "The Tunnel of Love," Fun Boy Three 

The first of two Bananarama-free Top Tens for these ex-Specials was this cool slice of tango-pop about how young romance is doomed to end in heartbreak and divorce.  Bleak worldview aside, this is fantastic stuff.

13 - "Last Night a DJ Saved My Life," Indeep

The only hit for this New York funk outfit was this dance classic about how a woman was spared from dwelling on her cheating man by a disc jockey playing just the right song.  I wish there wasn't a problem I couldn't fix because of my ability to do so in the mix.  Life would be so much easier.

12 - "Christian," China Crisis 

From the Liverpool suburb of Kirkby, this band scored their first of five Too 40s with this enigmatic synth ballad about losing oneself in honesty.  At least that's what the  most repeated lyric says.  Don't know what it has to do with Christians, or China for that matter.

11 - "Gloria," Laura Branigan

The late New York belter only charted twice in Britain, but she went Top Ten both times.  The first was this dance-rock soap opera masterpiece.  Just perfect.

When I hear that Top Ten bling, it can only mean one thing.

10 - "Electric Avenue," Eddy Grant

I would have thought his homeland would have let him "take it higher" than he did in America, but no, it stopped at #2 here too.  Oh well, Canada did right by Eddy.  You're welcome.

9 - "Oh Diane," Fleetwood Mac

Surprisingly, the slick later version of this band that conquered America wasn't that much more successful in Britain than the original, more blues-oriented version.  This was only the second U.K. Top Ten of the Buckingham/Nicks eradicated, and it didn't even chart in America.  Which is a shame, because it's a nice little Buckingham-sung love song that's a throwback to late-50s/early-60s sock hop slowdanceballads.  A forgotten gem.

8 - " Wham Rap (Enjoy What You Do)," Wham!

Before the London heartthrob duo broke through in the U.S. in '84, they scored five Brit hits, the second being this hip-hop homage about the fun and splendor of unemployment.   Surprisingly, George Michael does a more than adequate job of aping the early rap style of artists like The Sugarhill Gang and Kurtis Blow, and he one-ups a lot of future rappers by singing the hook as well.  I can honestly say I enjoyed what they did here.  And in a field lacking in real strangeness, this gets an Uneasy Rider.

7 - "Up Where We Belong," Joe Cocker and Jennifer Warnes

Only got this high here, but the iconic An Officer and a Gentleman ballad was a U.S. #1 and won an Oscar.  Movie producer Don Simpson wanted it cut from the movie, insisting it was awful and would never be a hit, and he remained unmoved by it's success.  I can't say I love it either, but I recognize the commercial sweet spots it hits.

6 - "Africa," Toto 

They blessed a continent's rains.  I don't know if that had any effect, but hey, if a flapping butterfly can...

5 - "Billie Jean," Michael Jackson 

The only better strutting song in the world than "Staying Alive."

4 - "Change," Tears for Fears 

Another duo with hits here at home before breaking America.  The second Top Five for these Bath boys was this smooth new waver about relationship evolution.  It might be my favorite of theirs.

3 - "Sign of the Times," The Belle Stars

The third and biggest of four Top 40s for these eight women from London was this bouncy pop song about a relationship that can't last due to incompatibility.  Head-bobbingly fun.  But their best hit was their first, an amazing cover of the Mardi Gras song "Iko Iko" that would later become their only American hit after its use in the movie Rain Man.

2 - "Down Under," Men at Work 

I don't care how many times I hear this song, I'm still never trying Vegemite.

And your U.K. charttopper of 34 years ago was...

1 - "Too Shy," Kajagoogoo 
The nonsensically-named ones actually had four more hits after this here.  But does the rest of the world care?  Uh...that's a kajanono.  This is quite enough, thanks.

Tune in next time to see what month and year I'll land in next.